Jealousy Strikes Just As Hard As A Kick In The Nuts
by Ennui Acedia
Summary: Gintoki uses others for physical pleasure to forget his past. Katsura is one of his frequent lovers, although feelings have arisen that are stronger than just lust in Katsura. Hijikata is just an outsider to Gintoki's sex life, until one day the Yorozuya decides to play with the mayonnaise lover and use him as a toy. Will feelings develop between Gin and Hijikata, or Gin and Zura?
1. Prologue

Pairing: GinHiji & GinZura

Disclaimer: all characters belong to Hideaki Sorachi, this story is just for fun purposes.

A/N: ehhh, this is my first Gintama fanfiction, but definitely not my first yaoi fanfiction. I've never actually published anything on here, so this may not turn out correctly. Ne...please enjoy :)

* * *

-_**Prologue**_-

* * *

Nothing could have been better or worse at that moment for Hijikata Toushirou. He watched in shock as he saw Sakata Gintoki stride from an Okama bar, laughing obnoxiously as he was led by a woman (man?) towards a cheap, sleazy looking hotel.

It didn't particularly matter to Hijikata that the damn Yorozuya was heading off to fuck some unknown man-woman. All that mattered was the fact that it happened right in front of him, and he would not allow the perm haired bastard to ruin his life by getting some sort of disease from a tranny.

And with those thoughts in mind, Hijikata headed off after one idiot and one man-woman.

* * *

Sakata Gintoki, drunk off his ass, clung to Katsura, who was dressed in drag. He felt his face heat up when he looked at the feminine man who was leading him along towards who-knows-where. He didn't really care where he was being led to, just as long as he got some shut eye before Kagura decided to be a deviant and stay up until he got home.

He stumbled slightly as they went, nearly making both himself and "Zurako" fall into a heap. But, thankfully, the tranny was able to keep both of them stable.

Gintoki laughed slightly, hiccuping as he did. "Ne, Zura...-"

He felt Katsura stiffen beside him at those words. "Oi, Gintoki, it's not Zura, it's Zurako."

He sighed slightly, a small hiccup escaping his lips. Gintoki leaned in closer to the she-man, his face nuzzling into the crook of Zura's neck. He sniffed the Okama's neck, a small moan escaping his lips. Katsura smelt so good, so good, and it sent a shiver down Gintoki's spine.

The Yorozuya reached for Katsura's ass, but before he could grab ahold of the firm-looking buttocks, he was squirted in the face with mayonnaise. He fell back, from the shock of having something hitting his face, and fell flat on his ass.

He went to wipe his face, only to smell the noxious scent of a lit cigarette. He wiped the mayonnaise from his eyes, finding himself face to face with the Vice Commander of the Shinsengumi, Hijikata Toushirou.

"Eh? What're you..." Hiccup. "...doing here..." Hiccup. "...Oogushi-kun...?" Hiccup. Gintoki rubbed his eyes continuously as he stared at the dark and handsome male in front of him. In fact, just looking at Hijikata while drunk seriously turned him on. The tension radiating from the male was slightly nauseating, but the stricken look of anger (and pain?) made Gin want to cuddle up to the Mayora.

He bit his lower lip lightly as he stared at Hijikata, his mind wandering to dirty, dirty places. Gintoki reached up to touch the smooth, pale skin of the dark haired man in front of him. He smiled at the Shinsengumi officer as his fingers brushed across the fine-textured cheek, which, ironically, was distinctively turning a light pink, making the Mayora look quite cute and adorable.

* * *

Katsura, or Zurako at the moment, watched the exchange between the two males silently. He bowed his head to hide his eyes from being seen. He knew the mediocre relationship that Gintoki and himself had went no farther than sex, but just watching the scene play out front of him; watching his one-sided love affection start wanting another made Katsura's heart lurch strongly.

Before he saw anything else, before he saw an exchange that would surely break his heart in more pieces, he turned and walked off, leaving the two males alone.

* * *

Hijikata felt his face heat up as the Yorozuya touched his cheek, his finger trailing softly down his cheek to his throat. He gulped as those cool fingers moved over his racing pulse.

"...! Y-Yorozuya...st-stop," he said quickly as he looked away, grabbing Gintoki's hand as he did so, his fingers and palm enclosing around the perm head's wrist.

He pushed that hand farther and farther away from his face until he knew he could make an easy escape. All he had wanted to do was help out Gintoki, so that he didn't turn into a homo.

But what Hijikata didn't know was that Sakata Gintoki was truly a homo, and he enjoyed fucking pretty, handsome men senseless, along with breaking their hearts when he was through playing with them.

Gintoki, he considered all men his toys. And Hijikata wasn't an exception.


	2. Chapter 1

_Eehhh, first true chapter is finally here. Took me a while to grasp how to continue, but I somehow figured it out._

**_I'd like to thank my awesome beta, Tara(she doesn't have an account), for going through and helping me out with this. _**

_Sadly, this chapter literally goes nowhere, mainly just rambling. I'm not positive when sexualness will come in, so I made the rating M just to be sure, hehe._

**Enjoy!**

* * *

-**_Chapter One_**-

* * *

In the beginning, everything was normal. There were no feelings involved, there was no talk about the situation beforehand. If it happened, it happened. And when it happened, the physical pleasure nearly engulfed Katsura each time.

But, somehow, his feelings grew from just the pleasure and lust he felt for his old friend, Gintoki, to something that resembled love. In truth, he would never admit to anyone, not even himself, that he loved the natural perm head. It wouldn't matter anyway if Gintoki found out, because if he did he would immediately break off their physical relationship.

And, regretfully, Katsura definitely did _not_ want that happening. It may just be a physical relationship, it may just be sex; simply a way to satisfy the perm haired bastard's sexual whims, but, to Katsura, it was much more.

* * *

Gintoki stared up at the ceiling of his small apartment-type home, a lowly sigh drifting from his partially open lips. There was zilch to do, Kagura and Shinpachi were out with Otae(probably shopping for food, or maybe stopping at a cheap restaurant to eat, who really knew?), the fan had stopped working a while ago, and his sugar levels were at an all time low.

He stretched out on the couch he was lying on, his eyes closing for just a moment before he heard loud knocking at the front entrance. He didn't want to bother with getting up just to answer the damned door, so he yelled, "Oi, come on in, I won't bite!"

Gin heard the sliding door open, then slide shut. He heard a few footsteps, and then the sound of shoes being removed quickly. Once he heard the shoes being dropped on the floor in a rude manner, there were more footsteps coming his way.

He didn't bother looking at the person who had entered his home, probably on a whim. He already knew who was standing silently next to him as he relaxed on the couch.

"Oi, Zura, don't just stand there. Take a seat," Gin kept his voice low and sultry, an easy smile on his lips.

"...it's not Zura, it's Katsura. Learn it, you damn 'natural' perm head." The voice that spoke was tense, annoyed it seemed.

Gintoki stiffened at the sound. He leaned up on his elbows and turned his head to look into Zura's deep brown eyes. Gin reached out to touch the elegant man, but he backed away in a shuffling manner, his eyes downcast.

Zura then spoke in a quiet tone, his eyes still down. "...Gintoki...we should stop...our physical relationship..."

Gin's ears perked up at those words and he stood up quickly, pulling Katsura into his arms. "...what do you mean, Zura..." He paused for a moment, collecting his thoughts. "Zura...Kotarou, what's the meaning for this? You visiting me, acting tense and uncomfortable, and suddenly deciding to end our relationship? Why?"

Katsura fidgeted in the Yorozuya's arms, not bothering to push the slightly taller man away. "I...Gintoki...my feelings...they're...different from the ones you feel for me," he said solemnly.

Gintoki pulled away ever so slightly, his face stoic and lazy as usual. He looked at Katsura's face, and when the latter bowed his head to hide his eyes, Gin grabbed his chin with one hand, while the other pushed Zura's dark bangs away from his eyes.

"Don't look away, Kotarou," he whispered as he brought the feminine man closer to his body.

He leaned his face close to Zura's; the latter's warm breath tickling Gin's lip as he got ready to bring their lips together.

"G-Ginto-"

And the sliding door opened once more, revealing the demon Vice Commander of the Shinsengumi.

Gintoki sighed outwardly and let go of Katsura, who was struggling. Once he was released, the dark, long haired male ran and hid in Gin's room, just as Hijikata walked over to the Yorozuya.

* * *

Hijikata hadn't planned on going to the damned Yorozuya's place. But, for some odd reason, his body had unintentionally brought him there. He scratched his head in embarrassment.

"Oi..I came by to see.." His voice had trailed off; he had tried to keep his voice harsh, and was doing pretty well, until he noticed a flushed expression on the perm hair's face, which caused his words to just stop in the middle of his sentence.

Hijikata felt his left eyebrow twitch as he stared at the man in front of him with a lustful look on his face. What didn't make sense was why he had that expression. Was someone hiding as he stood there in front of Sakata? Had someone been planning to sleep with the man?

Had Hijikata interrupted the moment between two lovers? And if so, where was the supposed lover that he had come up with? And why was his heart lurching in his chest at the thought of the Yorozuya having a lover?

So many questions, and in this silence he probably wouldn't get any answers.

* * *

Katsura watched from the cracked opening in the bedroom of Gintoki. He watched as the Shinsengumi officer got this wondrous and confused look on his face. He watched as Gintoki reached out to touch Hijikata's shoulder lightly.

He couldn't see the look on the former's face, but the look on the Vice Commander's face was threatening to the relationship that Katsura had with Gintoki. He should stop anything from happening before an idea blossomed in the perm head's brain, but how should he do it?

He then noticed a look cross the black haired male's face; it was the look of complete and utter embarrassment.


	3. Chapter 2

A/N: **Eh, ah, um, yeah. I tried to make this chapter longer than the others, and I think I did an okay job. Though, I pretty much made everyone OOC, be it a bit or whole fucking lot.**

_I thoroughly apologize if this chapter is crap, but at least the scenes lead up to some sexualness, though probably not with the pair many readers would prefer._

**Oh, and I probably should apologize if my grammar/spelling is incorrect. I couldn't exactly get into contact with my beta, so yeaaaah.**

_Sorry 'bout that. ｍ（＿ ＿；；ｍ_

**Please enjoy! :)**

* * *

-**_Chapter Two_**-

* * *

Hijikata's facial expressions changed as Gintoki stared at him. The looks that crossed his face were priceless; a mixture of cuteness and a declaration of war, with a dab of confusion and lust.

Gintoki sucked in a deep breath as he stared at the mayonnaise freak, his heart beating oddly at the different expressions on the Mayora's face.

He brought up a hand to touch Hijikata's shoulder; a slow, sensual smile crossing the slight sadist's face. "Ne, Oogushi-kun, you seem more brilliant, not in intelligence, but the brilliance of your looks. Why is that so? Why do you seem much more perfect than usual? I don't understand," Gin said with ultra sobriety, and a little fondness mixed in.

He watched lazily as a faint blush rose up on Hijikata's cheeks, causing his sharp, handsome features tone down and make him seem younger, more adorable.

"E-eh!? W-what d-do you m-mean, d-damn Yorozuya," Hijikata spoke, his voice shaking and his words ending up as flimsy stutters.

"Oh?" Gintoki moved his hand upwards from Hijikata's shoulder to the corner of his mouth. His thumb brushed over the Mayora's lower lip. "You should know exactly what I mean."

He moved closer to the vice commander; so close that Gin's forehead was against the dark-haired male. His hand stroked the latter's cheek tentatively, in case Hijikata decided to move away from the touch.

But, in a weird way to be OOC, he didn't. Instead, he seemed to want the caress; almost as if he craved the slightest touch he received from Gin.

Gin felt his lips twitch, his almost lazy composure turning into one of a degenerate. He smirked as he felt Hijikata nuzzle his cheek even more into his outstretched hand. The Mayora seemed cat-like, and just the sight of an adorable, slightly submissive male sent Gintoki's head soaring into the clouds.

* * *

Katsura watched in annoyance as the fucking vice commander of the Shinsengumi seemed to fall neatly into Gintoki's palms. The guy didn't seem to be that way ever when he tried to arrest Zura, but once he was near the Yorozuya, he seemed to just melt into a puddle of goo.

"...damn it. Gintoki is mine, not yours, you little fucker," Katsura whispered angrily to himself as he watched the two in their own world.

He then took notice of a creepy, sadistic aura emanating from Sakata. "Oho, it seems Gintoki has found himself a new toy..."

Katsura was both greedily happy that Gin saw Hijikata as nothing more than a toy, but it also sent little tremors of pain throughout his heart from the fact that Gintoki had easily found another in such a short period of time of Zura disappearing from sight.

He curled his hands into fists as he watched Hijikata bite his lower lip, which made him annoying appealing and luscious.

_Gintoki totally wants him, god dammit..._

"Tch, jealousy really sucks...idiot," Katsura said quietly to himself as he leaned his head against the sliding door of Gintoki's bedroom.

* * *

Hijikata figured he shouldn't be standing there, allowing the damned Yorozuya to be touching his face, be it his cheek, lips, anywhere. But he couldn't move away from the refreshing caress on his face.

Before he had even realized what he was doing, he had leaned his face into the warmth of Gintoki's palm.

_It feels good..._

He let out a sigh, his heart beating frantically at the closeness. He relished in the warmth of both Sakata's hand and his forehead pressing against Hijikata's own.

This closeness, this interesting warmth, it was nothing new to Hijikata. He'd had lovers before, he'd been in love before. But all those times, it'd never been a man to hold him, touch him, give him warmth. It had always been women. That was a simple truth about Toushirou.

Although, each and every time he'd held a woman in his arms, each time he took a woman to his bed, it had never felt this warm before. Never. Not a single time. Not even when he'd been confessed to by Mitsuba had he felt this type of warmth in both his body and his heart.

Was it because Gintoki Sakata was a man? Was it because, before now, Hijikata had never been touched by a man in this way? Or was there another reason that he didn't realize or know about?

_This warmth...it's too fucking troubling._

And with those thoughts in mind, Hijikata pushed Gintoki away as he yelled loudly, "get the fuck away from me, you homo bastard!"

Hijikata brushed off his uniform, wiping away undistinguished traces of the candy lover's touch. Once he was finished, he went to sweep his dark hair away from his eyes, but he stopped when he spotted a form watching from a doorway.

Had he been too ignorant, too neglectful, to actually not see an evil looking aura sending waves of hate from that doorway!?

Hijikata felt one of his eyebrows twitching as he stomped, loudly, over to the sliding door. He slid the door open fully.

And, he found himself face-to-face with Katsura Kotarou.

* * *

Gin watched in absolute horror as Hijikata found the recklessly hidden Zura. God, he had forgotten all about Katsura; and he'd probably witnessed the whole scene between Gin and the Mayora, though it hadn't led up to anything, since the latter had decided to play the bitch and push Gin-san away.

"Eh? Eh? Who's this stranger? What're you doing here, little guy?" Gin walked over to Zura and grabbed him by the collar on his yukata. "You shouldn't be snooping around in my home, ne, little guy?"

He tried to keep his words light hearted, as if he didn't know Katsura, but it seemed Katsura had other ideas on how to approach this situation.

"It's not 'little guy', it's Katsura! And Gintoki, don't you go calling me that! I'm only a few centimeters shorter than you are, idiot," Zura said with such enthusiasm that it was actually kinda scary. "And we've known each other all these years, what's the the problem with a few centimeters difference in height, it's never seemed to bother you before...I mean, you seemed to just love it in bed..."

Those last few words were barely said above a whisper, but the look on Hijikata's face said it all. He now knew the relationship between Sakata Gintoki and Katsura Kotarou, and the expression he was showing spoke volumes.

_Well shit._

Gin gulped down a few breaths of air as he waited for anything, be it a slap from Katsura(he really did expect that, since he always used him for sex and almost took Hijikata with him still there), a click of handcuffs from the demon vice commander, or even two sets of a kick in the balls.

What he didn't expect was Hijikata to just stand there, a defeated, darkened expression on his face. Katsura seemed to notice, so he took full swing and jumped Gintoki as he stood there.

"Hey, Gintoki, would you take me to bed? We could show this vice commander how two men fuck. What do ya say? You up for it?"

Gintoki nodded, a slight smirk crossing his lazy features in a split second. "Sure. Ne, Oogushi-kun, ready to learn how two men do _it_?"

All Hijikata Toushirou did was move his head slightly up and down, signaling for Gin and Zura to get the show on the road. They both grinned maniacally as they moved towards the readily made futon in the middle of Gin's bedroom floor.

* * *

Hijikata moved with caution towards an empty space on the tatami mats. As he sat, he ignored two sets of blazing eyes watching him; one set was glaring with heated rage, while the other seemed to watch with a lust filled gaze.

He shivered as those eyes bore into him once he was fully seated. He fidgeted there as he sat, his body growing uncomfortable from the fact that he would be watching two men have sexual relations, and one of those men being the one that had somehow captured Hijikata's emotions with such ease.

In actuality, instead of being just uncomfortable, he was slowly becoming pissed off.

* * *

Gintoki had been watched the display of emotions cross the handsome face of Hijikata with such intensity, the only way he'd come undone from his trance was when Katsura had stroked the eager bulge in his pants.

He let out a short gasp at the feeling.

_God, I fucking love being touched...I fucking love sex. I need to fuck. Now._

And, with those thoughts in mind, he brushed aside the animosity of being watched by a foreign person in his bedroom. He made the second move on the road to having sex.

Gin pushed Zura down, so he could lean over the latter. Katsura stuck out his tongue, tempting Gintoki to capture his mouth with his own; he did just that.

He pressed their lips together, sliding his tongue smoothly into Zura's waiting mouth. Their tongues clashed together, each one trying to outdo the other, but Gintoki's won with ease.

Steadily, Gin's hands started roaming down the long, dark haired male's yukata-clad body, undoing the obi around his perfectly figured waist.

As he did so, he all but ignored the waves of angry eye-daggers hitting his back.


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N**: **Well, so sorry it took so long to update. This chapter is still in editing, so I'll be editing it once my beta gets back to me. I just got very impatient and just decided to update. O.o**

_I apologize early on about the crappy sex scene/foreplay. I also apologize for not getting to the reviews until now. My replies to them all are below after all the sex and shit._

**Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy! \(^_^)/**

* * *

-_**Chapter Three**_-

* * *

Hijikata glared daggers at the Yorozuya's back as said man was kissing the long haired terrorist, his hands roamed down to start undoing the obi around Katsura's waist. He wasn't happy; he wasn't angry either, which was quite surprising.

In fact, instead of the anger from having two god damn ronins about to fuck right there with an officer watching, his mind was more on the reality that his heart was hurting from the scene playing out in front of him.

A low sigh escaped his lips as the show began.

* * *

Gintoki gripped Katsura's hard erection in his hand, squeezing teasingly as the latter groaned. He thumbed over the slit, catching a bead of pre-cum before it dribbled down the side of Zura's member.

The yukata, having been stripped off and tossed to the side, was no longer in the way. Gin stopped fondling the organ, which caused Katsura to look up and glare at the perm head.

Said man smirked, just as both of his hands started to move up the dark haired man's well-toned body. A long groan was bellowed as one of Gintoki's hands tweaked the pink nubs on Zura's body. His fingers rolled the left one for a while, waiting for it to get hard, then moved on to the next one.

Once he was thoroughly satisfied with the gasps and moans his partner was making, the Yorozuya's hands moved back downwards towards the now devilishly leaking cock waiting for more loving. His lips twitched upwards into a grin as he stared at the weeping head.

Gin knew Katsura was getting impatient, but he didn't want to rush things, considering they had a guest watching their every move. He turned his head slightly, capturing the eyes of Hijikata with his own.

Then, without warning to his lover, Gintoki took Katsura's cock into his mouth, engulfing the length with ease; hey, he'd had a ton of practice.

Zura's back arched off the futon. The perm head sucked hard on the erect organ in his mouth, drawing continuous whimpers from his dark haired partner. His eyes, which were locked on Hijikata's, twinkled in humor as he watched lust fill the vice commander's blue eyes.

Releasing his eyes from Toushirou's, his gaze traveled downwards, moving towards the groin area. He took notice of a nicely sized bulge and grinned, sucking even harder on the dick in his mouth.

Gin bobbed his head up and down, his tongue swirling around the tip, licking at the slit to make Zura moan out in ecstasy. Once he noticed that his long haired partner was tensing up, meaning he was just about to reach his climax, Gintoki released the erection from his mouth with a pop.

He grinned and nudged Katsura, motioning towards the pillow by his head. Zura just cocked his head, as if he was playing dumb, and stuck out his tongue. Gin felt his eyebrow twitch in annoyance, but he brushed it off.

_No point in getting annoyed with Zura when we're just about to get to the good part._

He let out an annoyed huff. "...you know, Zura, I need that pillow you have oh-so-conveniently near your head."

Katsura let out a low laugh, as if he was making fun of Gin. He grabbed the pillow, tossing it to the Yorozuya, who, subsequently, let it fall perfectly right between Zura's spread legs.

"It's not Zura, it's Katsura," was all the bottom male said in reply to Gin.

He let out a low chuckle at an annoyed grunt when he lifted up Katsura's hips, sliding the pillow beneath said man's lower back, close to his ass.

Once the long haired ronin was situated, Gin reached inside of his own yukata. His hand moved around until he finally found the bottle of lube he always carried around with him, along with some condoms, just in case he got lucky.

He tossed the condoms to the side, deciding not to bother with them just yet. He would get to them soon enough, but first he had to prepare his willing, submissive, adorable, partner. ((A/N: yes, I'm going to make these bastards practice safe sex, cause I mean, come on. Gin-san's a motha fuckin playa, who knows where's he's been. AND HIJIKATA'S WATCHING SO HE HAS TO MAKE A GOOD IMPRESSION, AMIRIGHT?))

Gintoki snapped the lube bottle's cap open; he squirted a fair amount onto his fingers, making it so that they were quite slick and slimy.

He reached down and touched Katsura's opening, sliding two fingers in easily, causing poor Zura to gasp as the sudden entrance.

"G-Gintoki, you...you c-could've warned m-me," Zura moaned out as the perm head started scissoring his fingers inside of Katsura's ass, stretching the tight ring of muscles.

Zura clawed at the futon below him. Breathy moans escaping his partially closed lips as his body trembled from the intrusion in his ass. Finally, once Gintoki decided he was stretched enough with just two fingers, said man pushed in one more and continued to stretch out Katsura's entrance.

And then, before he even realized he had brushed over the bundle of nerves that he needed to watch out for, Zura whimpered, his head flailing from side to side. The Yorozuya smirked devilishly, having found that perfect spot. He allowed his fingers to brush over that spot multiple more time, causing his current lover to cry out in delight, his voice getting higher and higher as the pleasure overtook him.

Gintoki chuckled and removed his fingers, only to make Katsura glare at him through lust glazed eyes. The former turned his head to the side unintentionally, just to see if Hijikata still had that delectable bulge in his pants.

What he saw, well, it sure sent blood and intense lighting straight to his groin.

There Hijikata Tiushirou sat, his head leaning back against the wall, small pants and moans escaping his lips. Gintoki's eyes moved lower from his face, down to his nether regions, only to find the demon vice commander with his dick out, stroking it harmoniously.

_Oh god._

Gin gulped harshly, and quickly swiveled his head back to Katsura, whom looked severely pissed. Ignoring the angry glares sent in his direction, the perm head reached down to his own crotch and slowly undid the belt that wrapped around his yukata.

He eagerly slipped his yukata off, and then made his way towards getting his own erection out in the open. Predictably, once his dick was free from the confinements of his pants, he ignored all eyes on him as he grabbed a condom from the side, ripping the package open with his teeth.

He removed the condom carefully, and slid it onto his length, groaning at the feeling of something around his cock, even if it wasn't anything close to an ass, mouth, or even a vagina(when no man wanted to fuck he usually took a woman home). He once again reached for the bottle of lube, squirting quite a bit into his hand, only to spread it along his erection, making it nice and slick.

Gin sighed in relief as he pressed his length against Katsura's entrance. He poked and prodded, teasing poor Zura; who just lay there, grinding his ass against the hard erection at his anus.

Deciding not to decline Zura's needs any longer, Gintoki eased in, a low groan emitting from his mouth as the warmth and snug fit graced his now eager erection. He gulped in air, breathing evenly as he found himself fully in after several pushes.

_Zura's getting looser, meaning it'll be easier access next time I need to fuck him._

He grinned at that idea, only to let out another groan as Zura squeezed his cock, nearly milking him and making him come right then and there. When he settled his breathing, which had become erratic as the friction around his dick increased, he slowly made his way of pulling out of Katsura's perfect ass.

Once only the head of his cock was still being embraced by Katsura's depths, Gintoki thrusted in. Full force.

* * *

Hijikata watched the whole thing, his eyes wide with shock and his dick perking up even more at the sight of the Yorozuya plowing full force into the long haired ronin. His hand was skillfully wrapped around his own erection, stroking lazily as he watched on.

He noticed relatively early that Sakata had tossed a few condoms aside, almost as if he would go bare and unprotected. But, the damn perm head had once again surprised the vice commander. Even if it wasn't much by putting on a condom, the practice of safe sex actually turned him on, in a way.

It meant that the Yorozuya's flesh and cum never left an imprint on any one lover. Maybe, just maybe Hijikata could find a way and squeeze his way into getting Gintoki to not use a condom on him...

Wait. I'm not planning on having sex with that god forsaken sweet toothed bastard, am I?

* * *

Katsura's stomach rolled as he was pounded into, his pants, grunts, and moans filling his ears. His eyes were shut, but he opened then, just a bit, to watch Gintoki.

As he watched, all he saw there was lust and passion, nothing close to love. Then, he noted, Gintoki seemed to unconsciously turn his head to the side to stare at that fucking Hijikata Toushirou.

That's when Katsura noticed that Gintoki's eyes no longer held just lust and passion as he stared at the demon vice commander, there was something else. Something...foreign.

Before he allowed his jealousy to flare up even more, Katsura reached up and grabbed Gintoki, pulling him close to kiss him hard on the mouth. He wouldn't ever allow the perm head to look at anyone else while he rammed himself into Zura's willing body.

_Never. You son of a bitch._

He shut his eyes as he felt an orgasm slowly overtake him when Gintoki grabbed ahold of his length, pumping madly.

* * *

Gintoki was pulled close, by Katsura, to find himself in a lip-lock with said man. He groaned into the sweet, sexy mouth, his erection still pounding away into Katsura's warm, blissful ass.

_God this was perfect. So fucking perfect._

He reached down to grasp Zura's weeping cock, giving it a few strokes before he felt the warm, tight abode of the latter's ass squeeze him tight, letting him know that Katsura was close. So close.

He moaned out loud, parting their lips as he panted harshly, himself finally reaching his own climax as he felt warmth spread into his hand.

Zura actually came before me. Holy fuck.

Gintoki let out another moan, this time thrusting even harder than before into Zura, his orgasm closer than before. Until, finally, he came inside of the condom, inside of Katsura.

Panting breathlessly, he didn't pull out immediately, deciding to ride out his orgasm. As he did so, he heard a breathy groan coming from their guest. He smirked at that, and slipped out of Zura.

He removed the used condom quickly, not wanting to stay in his own filth for longer than need be. He looked around the room, spotting a convenient trash can in the corner, right next to Hijikata.

Gin stood and strode over, tossing the condom into said trash can. His eyes flitted over the Mayora, taking in his heavenly pants and the slowly wilting cock held in those nice, firm-looking hands.

He leaned down close to Hijikata's ear, whispering flirtatiously, "So, how was it, ne, Oogushi-kun? Wanna try sometime?" He then proceeded to bite the Mayora's ear teasingly, as if coaxing him to fight back.

Before Gin could even react, he felt a body lean over his back. "Hey, Gintoki, don't forget about me. I need help...cleaning up, if ya know what I mean," Katsura said, his voice surprisingly low and quite seductive,"...and this time, don't invite the goddamn bastard. I want some...alone time, Gintoki."

Hijikata stood up swiftly, pushing Gintoki back and away from himself. He ran a hand through his hair, a menacing glint in his eyes. He pulled out handcuffs, and, without Gin being able to react quick enough, slapped them on Katsura's wrists.

"Come on, you fuckin' terrorist," Hijikata growled, his anger to be seemingly at a peak.

* * *

**_A/N_****: Haha, yay! It's time to reply to all the reviews I've stockpiled somehow!**

**[Chapter one]**

_Life Starts Forever_: ahaha, thank you so much for your review, and I'll try. Also, since you commented on the first chapter, I hope you're still reading and will continue to read. Hehe ^^

**[Chapter two]**

_KrazyStar_: Thank you very much, it means a lot to me when people enjoy my stories. I'll continue to try and continue, so if you're still with me on this story, I hope you stay till the end. :3

_higitsune84tails_: Thanks so much! Yeah, I'm a big drama/angst fan, so it makes me happy to see someone enjoys those same genres. :D I hope you stay and continue on reading :)

_karunebulous_: Ohayo, I'm glad you've enjoyed and thanks so much for reviewing & reading! I've tried harder to make the chapter longer, and each time I update I hope they'll be a bit longer than the last one. :)

**[Chapter three]**

_karunebulous_: Hello once again, you probably saw my reply just above, but I'd like to add more, considering I'm replying to your chapter three review.

I'm also a very, very strong shipper of GinHiji/HijiGin, but I threw Zura into the mix to add more drama, hehe, although once I finish I have no idea who Gin-chan'll end up with. And about the OOC, well, I love OOCness, and I would love to add comedy with tons of OOCness, I just have a crappy sense of humor when I write. (o.o) haha

I hope you thoroughly enjoyed Gin-chan's sexual pov, and sorry if it was so slow. I love foreplay, simply. XD

Sankyuu for reading/reviewing. I hope you stay with me till the end, hehe. :3

_higitsune84tails_: Hiya again, thanks for staying with me :3 I'll make Gin-chan more sadistic throughout the story when he continues to play with others feelings. And yeah, poor ol' Hijikata has to watch the world burn as Gin plows Zura. Though, I'm making him arrest Katsura, as pay back, hehe. :3

Thanks so much for reviewing and reading, so I thoroughly hope you continue to read on! :D

_KonKon_(**guest**): (excuse my ramblings, this is pretty long XD)

Thank you so much for enjoying! I know the story is moving along quite quickly, and I sincerely apologize. I swear I'll try to keep the story moving at an average pace later on, I just really had the urge to write smut, so why not write it early on? That way readers know they're reading delicious-smelling lemon.

Bahahaha, just kidding. I just made so much foreplay, and when you wrote your review, I had already finished this chapter(it was in editing when I received it), so I couldn't make it into a three-some. Sorry about that. (But maybe later on? *wink* *wink*) And about all the foreplay, god, I need to stop myself when doing that. (/._.)/

I also love the delectable pairing of GinHiji, but I also have a soft spot for GinZura. Oh, and about your question on Zura being a Joui rebel, yes he is. XD Though it hadn't really sunk into Hijikata's mind, considering he had just been flirted with and then asked to watch two males have sex. Of course he agreed though, I mean, who could resist. Well, maybe Kondo-San could...

And besides, Zura got arrested, just later than usual. He was still sore from that 'pounding' he got from Gin-chan, making it easier to capture the poor man. In Hijikata's case, he could've been planning for that. Who knows what goes through that man's mind. Even I don't know, and I'm writing a fic with him in it. *le face palm*

Well, once again, thank you for reviewing and enjoying! I hope you stay with me through the long run of writing this dramatic, slow/fast, smutty, fic.

_Life Starts Forever_: thanks so much for reviewing and such, it means so much and it makes me happeh as hell! :D I'll try to continue as quickly as I can, so if my updates aren't as frequent it's because my beta is a bit slow on editing and such. \(^_^)/


	5. Chapter 4

**_A/N_**: _Well Hello there again! Didn't expect another chapter so soon? Well, you probably did. I'm happy to present to you an un-betaed chapter. _

**My beta is on vacation, so she didn't have time to edit and such, so all mistakes are mine, and I sincerely apologize.**

_I hope you enjoy & all review replies are at the bottom! :3_

* * *

_**-Chapter Four-**_

* * *

Glaring down at his handcuffed hands, Katsura grunted an affirmative when the brunette shortie, aka Okita Sougo, asked him if he'd had plans made to 'greet' the Shogun at the huge banquet. He clenched and unclenched his hands, gritting his teeth as Okita continued to stand over him.

A hand grabbed ahold of his hair and yanked his head up. He grimaced as he came face-to-face with the demon vice commander.

Clicking his tongue in annoyance, Hijikata felt his lips lift up in a sneer. "Oh how the mighty have fallen, ne, _Ko-Ta-Rou_-kun?"

As eager to correct his name as ever, Katsura was easily interrupted by a hand suddenly gripping his jaw. A definitive clanging sounded as the ronin struggled.

"Damn Shogunate dog, don't fuckin touch me," Katsura bit out as he glowered a Hijikata, his death glare never leaving the Shinsengumi officer as he let go of Zura. The former smirked, turned around, and stalked out of the cold room, slamming the door shut behind him.

Katsura heard murmurs coming from outside of his little prison cell; the voices probably coming from the raved haired demon bastard and his perverted-stalker boss.

The long haired male let out a long sigh, his eyes roaming around the cramped cell. He laid his eyes on Sougo, having forgotten the sadist was even there.

The young male's eyes were shut, as if he was in deep thought, or just asleep. Katsura guessed it was the latter, but he could never tell with these Shinsengumi bastards.

Once he was done trying to figure out if the pest was asleep or not, he rattled his handcuffed wrists about. He didn't know exactly WHAT he was doing, however it seemed to have roused the pretty boy officer from whatever the hell he was doing.

Katsura earned a spiteful glare from the KID, though it didn't seem to make him doing anything about what Zura was doing. So, to be spiteful, he continued to do it, smirking all the while.

Maybe being captured by these bastards wouldn't be too bad...as long as he got to mess with them...

Grinning, he looked at the ceiling of the jail cell and laughed. He laughed so hard it fucking hurt.

* * *

Gintoki scooped a dollop of ice-cream into his mouth, groaning with pleasure as his taste buds nearly exploded. Licking his lips happily, he took another scoop of the wet-dream-perfect sweetness.

Kagura sat next to him; she was shoveling as much food into her mouth as fast as she could. Shinpachi sat on the other side of Gin; he sat there meekly and took slow, proportioned bites from his rice ball.

The Yorozuya chuckled and shook his head. God, where would he be without these two kids. Who knew? Surely he didn't, considering if they weren't around he'd be off chasing adorable, perfectly-shaped asses in the streets. For all he knew, if the damn kids weren't around, he'd be up shit creek without a paddle.

All it took for him to control his urges was the eager, but annoying, voices of both Shinpachi and Kagura. If they weren't around, well, he'd probably have tons if random diseases from who-knows-where.

Shuddering at the thought if being confined in a hospital bed for the rest of his life, Gintoki took a deep calming breath, and took another spoonful of ice-cream into his mouth.

Before he could even begin to get another spoon sized portion of the delightful creaminess, the glass door of the little sweets shop the Yorozuya group had been sitting idly in slammed open, shocking every person in the quaint little shop.

Gintoki turned around to face the loud intruders. He was ready to yell at them for interrupting his ice-cream and sweets time, only to sit there shell-shocked and silent.

There stood the most obnoxious and boisterous of all the men who'd graced Gin-san's bed(even if it was a mistake, and besides, Gin-san was druuuunk, he couldn't help who he slept with when he was intoxicated).

Kondou Isao grinned, his eyes blood shot and his weird hair-style all out of whack.

"Oh god, the fucker's drunk," Sakata groaned aloud as he face palmed.

_Damn, damn, damn. Why'd he have to come _here_, of all places, drunk off his fucking ass!? I mean, we've fucked once, but that doesn't mean he'd _not_ accidentally blow my whole straight guy persona. Shit._

Laughing like a psycho maniac, Kondou sauntered over to Gintoki and wrapped an arm around his shoulders. He then stopped laughing.

He leaned in close to the Yorozuya's ear and whispered soberly, "Hey, Sakata, we need to _hang_ soon, if you know what I mean." He winked.

Of course Gintoki knew what the gorilla meant. He wasn't as daft as many people thought, and it struck strongly in his groin at the thought of using Kondou as he pleased once more.

But, since he had his eyes on someone..._particular_, he needed to reject the idiot gorilla quickly, before things got out of hand and people started gossiping.

He shoved Isao away, causing said man to topple over and land in a heap on the floor. He was sprawled there, having passed out once he'd hit the floor.

Grunting, Gintoki stood and slapped the money he owed, for this meal, on the counter. He then stalked off and left the little shop, anger brewing and slowly bubbling up, almost pushing over the edge.

What he was pissed at, he didn't exactly know. Maybe the fact that he was nearly outed by a one-time fling with was drunk and _still_ obsessing over a violent woman, even though he'd recently laid with a man; or maybe it could be that he didn't enjoy the idea of a man, who was in _love_ with someone, trying to get in bed with Gin.

Sakata Gintoki may not have been the best person to go to when it came to love, he may not have been the best person to even become attached to in any romantic way, but he _did_ have his morals; and those morals went deeper than anything. He followed his own rules. He never broke them. _Never_.

* * *

**Gin-san's Romantic Rules**

_#1_: Gin-san will never come between any type of love, even one-sided*

_#2_: Gin-san will never commit to any one person

_#3_: Gin-san chooses his position during sex, be it topping or bottoming

_#4_: Gin-san will not flirt with any men during the day time hours*

_#5_: Gin-san will brutally torture any man that outs him. No exceptions.

***does not count if drunk**

* * *

Squeezing the bridge of his nose, Gintoki tried to calm himself. He could not get out of control. It wasn't the gorilla's fault the woman he loved treated him like shit. Though, it _was_ the gorilla's fault that he'd gotten drunk and sought after comfort from the perm head.

Eventually, his feet having had carried him there on their own will, he arrived at the Shinsengumi headquarters. He stared at the large building, his mind jumbled.

He needed to tell the bastards about their commander, but, in truth, he just wanted a reason to Hijikata. The man was so damn sexy that it must've been a sin just to have him walking around Edo in that terribly arousing uniform.

Kicking himself mentally, he cautioned himself and told himself over and over that he needed to control his libido, especially around the demon vice commander, since the man _had_ watched(rather erotically) Gintoki fuck Katsura senseless.

He guessed that if he did anything even close to sexual around Hijikata, he would immediately get arrested for actually helping a Joui member, let alone a _leader_, hideout at his place. Thankfully, the raven-haired sex on a stick didn't want it to get out that he'd even been around the Yorozuya; and if it got out that he'd gotten off on watching the perm head get it on with Zura, well, it wouldn't be good.

Gintoki understood those reasons, and would purposefully take seducing Hijikata in long, easy, sensual strides.

Grinning, he cracked his knuckles and headed towards the front entrance of the headquarters.

* * *

Hijikata sat sitting indian-style as he chain smoked. One cigarette after another left his mouth until he ended up with a pile of filters lying in his ash tray.

He stood up and stretched, not bothering to empty the butts from the tray. Someone else could do that; probably Yamazaki, but who gave a shit? He certainly didn't.

He left his bedroom, if you'd call it that, and strode down the hallways of the headquarters. He scratched the back of his head and chewed on the filter of his current cigarette.

As he continued to walk, he noticed white, permy hair that immediately made the hair on the back of his neck stand on end. He growled angrily and stomped over to the front entrance and threw open the wooden door.

He then heard the permy bastard's voice, which instantly irked the shit out of him. Hijikata really wasn't in the mood to see the Yorozuya, but the serious look on the usually stoic and lazy face made him tense up.

"Sakata-san, what's the matter? Your little pests make a mess and you need us to clean it up," Hijikata questioned with a light tone.

Gintoki shook his head and stared at the raven-haired male intently. "Oogushi-kun, now isn't the time for you to be kidding around. Your commander is passed out at the cute little sweets shop that I visit. I dearly enjoy that place, but with his gorilla smell and such, well, it might make the poor owners close up. So, get there quickly, _ne_." He grinned at Hijikata, a slightly psychotic look in his eyes.

Hijikata stiffened.

"Wait, wait, wait. Hold up," he said, his eyes wide and confused. He then started raging. "Kondou-san is where!? And don't you fuckin tell me what to do, perm head!"

He glowered a the candy maniac, who, by now, seemed off put and annoyed. "You know _exactly_ where your commander is, dumbass. And I will tell you what to do if you don't get your ass down there and retrieve him before that business shut down!"

Hijikata crossed his arms against his chest as he glared defiantly at Sakata. How did he know that the bastard wasn't just lying so that he could get into his pants.

He searched those wine-colored eyes, and, with a contented sigh, he stated calmly, "I believe you, eyes don't usually lie. But if yours are, I can't promise you'll come out of this unscathed, perm head." He grunted his approval.

The demon walked close to Gintoki and leaned over, murmuring in his ear, albeit seductively, "And besides, if you are lying, I can always arrest you for reasons you understand, you hear me? I'd actually enjoy torturing you, Yorozuya. Also, you're coming with me, in case you were planning on running while my back is turned once I seek out my superior."

With a half smirk, half sneer, Gintoki clapped his hand on Hijikata's back and stated loudly, "All righty then. I'll lead the way, _Hee-Jee-Kah-Tah_-san."

And they were off to find the drunkard Kondou, who was still passed out on the floor with Kagura poking him with a stick.

* * *

**_A/N_**: **Haha, one of my favorite parts! Replying to reviews! :3**

_Life Starts Forever_: Haha thank you! I really hope you enjoyed this chapter! :D

_KonKon_: Haha, I loved writing the sex chapter, so it made me super happy that you enjoyed! And yeah, I know, guys + sex = nosebleed x distractions. XD I feel super bad for making Zura upset, but his emotions will somehow be led towards someone more...I dunno, not Gin-chan. X3

I'll be bringing Takasugi in here soon, ya know, cause he'd just add more drama. Though, who he'd end up having screwed, idk(Gin or Zura o.o).

I mean, in this chapter Kondou has been screwed by/screwed Gin-chan, but it was only once. And they were drunk, haha. (Ppppssssttttt, Kondou has someone special coming along soon enough, so having been with Gin-chan was just a bump in the road XD)

Also, I promise I'll try not to add a threesome if I can help it, but who knows where my perverted mind will go. Though, Gin-chan won't be in on it, cause I want him to start saving himself for Hijikata, if I can help it. XD

I understand fully about rambling, I do it way too much for my own good. I should stop. O.o XD

I'm glad you're enjoying my story so far, means so much, and thank you for reviewing! :D

_Karunebulous_: Haha, yeah. To explain his last resort being women, he's, I guess, bi or pansexual, I'm not sure. Though, as explained in this chapter, he doesn't want to get outed. (Poor Kondou XD)

I had a huge ass smirk on my face as I wrote all that sex, so I know where you're coming from XD

And threesome? Maybe, haha. :3

I'm glad you enjoyed and I hope you stay with me as I continue writing! :)


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N**_: _**Hey guys. Guess what? Another update! Yeah! And it's longer than usual! Super long special, or maybe I'll keep making them this long!**

_Hm, well, no contact from my beta, so any mistakes are mine. I apologize beforehand for all the excessive grammar/spelling errors._

**-Another update shall be made in a few days, yaaaay-**

_Enjoy, ne! *grins*_

* * *

_-__**Chapter Five**__-_

* * *

_The room was silent. Three males glowered at the slumped over figure of Kondou Isao, commander and chief of the Shogunate dogs, the Shinsengumi. The post-drunk, passed out figure moved and a head lifted up, hazy brown eyes full of confusion._

_He had been dragged there by the first two figures, and the third in the back had just recently arrived, watching him carefully. And now was the time for his testaments to why it wasn't his fault, and then earn a lecture from one of the three figures of the room._

* * *

Kondou sat in front of both Hijikata and Gintoki, his head bowed in defeat. His head was pounding severely.

He heard some shoe tapping and the grinding of teeth, which irked him extremely. He ground his teeth, and nearly had the urge to jump up and strangle whomever was making that preposterous tapping noise.

He lifted his head and looked behind the two figures, his eyes attracted to a lone figure standing in the corner of the room. The figure's face barely registered in his mind before he shifted his gaze to the silver-white?-haired male. He didn't bother to look at the other male standing next to the perm head bastard.

His brown eyes locked with the red ones. Sakata lifted an eyebrow, as if asking an unspoken question.

Kondou bit his lower lip, shifting his eyes from the Yorozuya's gaze, and muttered, "It's not my fault I got drunk...and passed out..." He knew he was pouting, but did it really matter? His head was _killing_ him.

He heard a frustrated scoff. His eyes shifted towards the raven-haired vice commander, whom just glared menacingly at him.

The stalker-pervert shuddered at the look he received, and tilted his head away from the glare he was currently receiving from his second-in-command.

* * *

Hijikata was furious. And by furious, he meant super ultra frustrated/annoyed as shit furious. He was also severely pissed off, but many people usually considered that the same as being furious; consequently, to Hijikata, there _was_ a difference.

As he tried to calm his nerves, he reached into his pocket to get his pack of smokes, only to come up empty handed. He let out an embittered huff, his brain slowly starting to _crave_ the damned cancer sticks.

His hands clenched and unclenched, but before he allowed them to fully ball up into fists, he felt a warm, steadying hand on his shoulder. He looked over and shock coursed through his veins.

There stood the weirdly relaxed figure of Sakata Gintoki, who's smile was so lazy it actually made the tensed muscles in Hijikata's body slacken. He arched an eyebrow up in question, but just as soon as the hand was there on his shoulder, it was by Gintoki's side once again.

Hijikata let out a low sigh, and turned his attention back to the lazed, slumped over figure in front of them. He nearly sneered at his commander, but held back. He wasn't positive if the dumbass was awake or not, so he wouldn't take any chances. Just yet, anyways. He planned to _thoroughly_ punish his friend/boss.

He noticed that Kondou was slowly awakening and, after a few minutes, he mumbled something that made Hijikata let out an irked scoff.

Scratch that furious part from earlier; he was damn near homicidal. He took a step towards the depressed-looking figure of Kondou, and he ignored the saddened look on his face.

"Kondou-san, damn it." His left eye twitched. "Don't act all prissy and shit, you dumbass. Getting drunk _was_ your fault, and passing out was a part of that. Nobody in here is daft, except maybe Sougo and the Yorozuya, but–"

He heard twin sounds of disagreement with his statement, nevertheless he expertly ignored them.

"–you can't go off getting drunk whenever the fuck you want. Think of our damn near soiled reputation already, shit head. You do understand, don't you? I mean, it's simple." He sneered at Kondou. "Don't fuckin stalk Shimura Tae, less you want to end up arrested by one of us; and don't get drunk during the day, idiot."

He ground his teeth together, his nicotine fix definitely needed at the moment. Kondou let out an exasperated sigh and just nodded his head in submission.

Hijikata heard a snicker come from behind him, and then Sakata walked past him to the commander. The perm head leaned down, whispering something into Kondou's ear. The Mayora felt a slight pang of jealousy from the innocent, but somehow intimate, act between the two men.

He pulled out his mayonnaise bottle-shaped lighter and flicked it open, staring at the flame to distract himself. He barely registered the voice of Sougo, whom now stood next to him; he was also watching the rather close act between the two men in front of them.

He decided then to mess with Sougo's head a bit, since he knew of the slight crush he had on a particular perverted stalker. "Oi, Sougo, are you, perhaps..._jealous_," he said as his lips lifted up, turning from his usual frown to a sneer.

"Ah, Hijikata-san, I wouldn't say that _I'm_ the one jealous here, if you know what I mean. Which, of course, you do. You know _everything_, bastard." Those words made Hijikata stop playing with his lighter.

He stiffened up, and said, quite loudly, "Damn it, Sougo, don't call me a fuckin bastard!"

Hijikata was so close to pulling out his katana, so close to slicing Okita's tender jugular, so close to committing mass murder with all the idiots in Edo as his victims, but he held himself together. Well, as close together as a man whose patience was rapidly wearing thin.

"Ne, Hijikata-san, did I piss you off? If I did, you can go and die now," Sougo stated in his most obnoxious voice.

His voice grated along Hijikata's nerves, and just the light, whimsical laugh that escaped those childish lips irked him to no end.

As he tried to rein in his anger and other thundering emotions, out of the corner of his eye, Hijikata noticed a very, _very_ intimate thing pass between Kondou and Gintoki. It may have been an accident, but knowing the Yorozuya, Hijikata knew it wasn't anything of the sort. Lips brushed together in a way that said the two males had been _close_ at one time in the past.

A pang of something Hijikata didn't recognize resided in his heart, confusing him greatly. Deciding to distract himself and get out of that very room, he murmured that he was going to go get some smokes. He then stormed out, hurriedly walking towards the one place that he actually felt at peace.

* * *

Katsura sat alone in the confined space of his jail cell. His leg bounced up and down, over and over, distracting him from the loneliness he felt.

Why hadn't Gintoki come to break him out? Did the stupid perm head even give a _shit_ about someone who repeatedly shared his bed? God, he knew he was an idiot; he would admit that, but the fact that he wasn't broken out yet caused uneasiness to reside inside of him.

He knew he shouldn't ever trust the lazy Yorozuya– nevertheless, the bastard had wormed his way into Katsura's heart. He reached up and grasped the fabric of his yukata, right over his heart. He felt his emotions brewing, and he also felt his heart starting to break.

_It hurts..._

Taking in a deep breath, Katsura decided to put on his idiot facade. Everyone seemed to think of him as one anyways, so why not keep that disguise into play while he waits for any type of rescue?

Tossing his head back, he relaxed against the wall. He stared up at the cracked concrete ceiling, his mind deciphering how he would escape, even without help. He clasped his hands together, and then put them behind his head, allowing him to relax even more.

He shut his eyes as he tried to come up with ideas on how to either escape or piss off the damn Shinsengumi. One or both would be just fine with Katsura, since he had nowhere to be for a while, especially while Gintoki had his eyes set on seducing Hijikata Toushirou.

_Fuck it. I couldn't stop him then, as if I could stop him now..._

* * *

Lips lightly brushing over Kondou's own in a chaste kiss, Gintoki felt himself smirk at the Shinsengumi commander's nearly virginal reaction. Chuckling, he pulled back and took a few steps backwards. He wiped the feeling of even a bit of lips from his mouth.

It's not that he didn't _like_ kissing Kondou, it's just that, at the moment, he needed to keep himself collected and gain Hijikata's trust. Seducing the man would be hardwork, but it would totally be worth it.

Turning around, Gintoki first noticed the lack of a certain Mayora, and then noticed the jealous glare he was receiving from Sougo. With a smirk, he padded over to the tense form of the sadist and rested his head on the shorter male's shoulder.

"Ne, Sougo-kun, I always thought you went for the opposite sex. I never realized you felt _that_ way for men," he murmured in the younger man's ear.

Flinching remarkably, Okita backed away a bit from Gintoki, his glare cold and barred. "I..l don't know what you mean, Danna. I have never discriminated between genders, and I won't start now, unlike _you_."

"Ah ah, no need to be so testy, Sougo-kun. I was only teasing," he quipped.

Gintoki took a moment to collect his thoughts, and then stated, "I shall be leaving now. Your commander is all yours." As he passed by Okita to leave, he jeered, "And I bet you'd enjoy that, wouldn't you, Sougo-kun?"

And, without looking back, he left the room. As he padded down the empty hallways of the sleazy, but frequently used, motel, he stopped suddenly when he realized something.

* * *

Hijikata stood in front of his favorite store ever, which, sadly, was only open for a limited time. It seemed that the store's owners traveled around a lot, trying to see as much as they could.

He looked at the white dry-erase board, and grinned at the name.

**Mayonnaise Lovers Express**

It was the most perfect and wonderful place he'd ever had the pleasure of visiting and buying from. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a newly opened pack of cigarettes. He placed the cancer stick into his mouth and out it up, taking a long drag happily.

His gaze left the sign and moved to the mayonnaise bottle-shaped lighter in his hand. He smiled contentedly, his expression dreamy and almost relaxed.

As he stared off into space, his mind slowly wandered into the land of nothingness. Having not realized early on that someone was trying to speak to him, when a hand touched his shoulder, he nearly jumped out his skin.

"Holy fu–" He stopped immediately when he realized it was Shimura Tae, or Otae to just about everyone. "Oh. It's you."

Otae cocked an eyebrow up at him. "Is that all you can say? 'Oh. It's you'? You sure do know how to speak to women," she jeered at him.

"Shut it, gorilla woman. I've had a long day, thanks to _your_ stalker," he deadpanned, his voice dripping with annoyance.

Otae looked taken aback at his words, anger smoldering in her brown eyes. "G-gorilla woman!? And _my_ stalker, what do you mean by that, disgusting Mayora!?"

"You know what I mean, Go-Ree-La-Tae-san. The pervert who just _loves_ you got drunk and passed out in public. What did you say to him?" Hijikata kept his voice straight-laced and slightly harsh.

Looking from side to side, Otae's searching gaze stopped for a moment when she saw the sign– which, ultimately caused a wry smirk to form on her lips. Once she dismissed the sign and filed it to the back of her mind, she continued to look around, making sure nobody was watching too closely.

She then leaned in close to Hijikata, her breath cascading down his neck, as she whispered, "I'll explain shortly, if you wouldn't mind joining me for a cup if tea, Mayora-san." She accordingly blew in his ear sensually.

Hijikata backed up quickly, cupping his ear when his face turned a dark shade of scarlet. "O-oi."

With a grin that seemed to hold malicious intent, Otae walked off. She turned and stared at Hijikata for a moment, her eyebrows raised as if, 'you gonna follow me or what, bastard?'.

With a lowly sigh, Hijikata followed behind submissively. Thankfully, Gintoki wasn't around to see him being led around by a woman; and a gorilla woman at that.

* * *

"Commit seppuku."

"No."

"Just commit it already, Gintoki."

"Hell no, bastard."

"Oh? Are you, a lowly ex-Joui, defying _me_, the leader of the Kiheitei?"

Steeling his teeth, Gintoki tried to keep himself from giving Takasugi the evil eye. He really hated the guy, especially after catching the bastard spying on him.

They stood in an alleyway next to the place where Kondou and Sougo were. Takasugi having dragged poor Gin-san there to _talk_.

With a frustrated growl, he muttered, "I don't really see _why_ it matters if I commit seppuku or not, Takasugi. It's not as if I'm clearly a law breaker of any kind, and it shouldn't really matter, considering _you've_ been told, personally, to commit seppuku way too many times for me to count."

"Ah ah ah, Gintoki. I may just be assuming, but it seems that you've been trying to spend– let's say _quality_– time with a certain demon vice commander. If I am correct, well, goody for me." Takasugi smirked. "But– if I'm not– poor Zura may get _jealous_, since recently you two seem to be a type of _lover_. Or maybe I'm being assumptive again."

Gin felt an inner rage as he watched the cold, hardened look on the beautiful face of Takasugi. He attempted to make a comeback, but it fell flat when the Kiheitei bastard laughed his ass off, his evil demeanor lifting up to show actual emotions.

Before he even realized Takasugi was moving, Gintoki was pressed against the brick wall. An elbow on his neck, crushing his wind pipe. How he didn't see that action coming, he would never know.

Gasping for breath, his hands reached up and tried to remove the elbow from his throat, but to no avail.

The blockage of air to his lungs was let up ever-so-slightly, and he took a long, deep breath. He grimaced when he noticed that his hands were above his head; tied together by a piece of bandage that Gintoki guessed Takasugi carried around with him everywhere.

With calm precision, a hand had snaked into his yukata and was untucking his shirt from his pants. Deftly trailing a hand up his well-toned, and chiseled, abs, Takasugi chuckled with audacity.

"Oh my, you still have the same body as ever, don't you, Gintoki?" His calloused fingers rubbed over the fine pectorals, only to stop at a perky nipple.

Takasugi allowed his fingers to gently brush over the left one, and then the right one, which elicited a groan from the, now slightly flushed, perm head.

"Well, actually, you seem more keen in having your nipples touched, that must mean you've bottomed recently, or have you now started allowing your partners to enjoy your body to the fullest?" Having decided to take full advantage of Gintoki's mind blowing body, Takasugi tweaked both nipples, causing the most delicious of moans to escape the Yorozuya's agape mouth.

"Oi, T-takasugi, don't...nn...don't do t-that. P-please...st...stop...mm," Gintoki said breathlessly, his face flushed.

In retrospect, Sakata Gintoki would _never_ allow somebody to disgrace his body by pleasuring only his upper region. But, since he wasn't in control, he couldn't stop the delectable feeling of being touched mercilessly by another person, even if it was that bastard Takasugi.

The Kiheitei leader cupped his groin, squeezing the hardening bulge. "Ah! Ah, s-shit...nn...don't t-touch th–!"

They were suddenly interrupted by two figures storming close to where they were. Gintoki panted and breathed out a sigh of relief. He struggled a bit, trying to get his hands out of their bindings.

Takasugi glared at the couple, who just stood there staring at them. He head the urge to hiss like a cat to scare them away, but that would only weird them out and think of him as mentally insane. He didn't want that. People already thought he was psychotic anyways. No need to add to the list: neurotic paranoia.

He then realized that one of the figures of the couple, the male, was Hijikata Toushirou. The guy Gintoki so badly wanted to fuck.

"Oho, Gintoki, lookie who's here to watch the _show_," he said with a crooked grin plastered on his face.

Gin stopped struggling and took in the faces of the couple. His whole body froze.

There stood Hijikata and Otae, both gawking at the two ronin.

"Damn, shit, Oogushi-kun, you didn't need to see _this_."

Takasugi laughed. "Hah, so eloquently put, Gintoki." He reached up to untie Gin's hands, setting them free. And, before the Mayora realized he _was_ an actual criminal– and arrested him–, he made his escape right as Hijikata stormed over to arrest him.

Gintoki stared after the Kiheitei leader, unimpressed as Hijikata started yelling profanities. His usual lazy expression turned into one with mild humor, a snicker escaping his lips.

The angry Mayora turned to glower at him, a cigarette hanging loosely from his mouth. "You...! You let that Kiheitei bastard get away! And what were you _doing_ with him!?" Hijikata's voice was loud and harsh.

Sakata only smirked at him and rubbed his wrists nonchalantly. "It's not _my_ fault I got distracted and tied up by him."

Hijikata made a face that nearly resembled a pout, but it disappeared as quickly as it has appeared. His gaze slipped downwards, and he mumbled under his breath, "You weren't tied up _that_ tight, stupid perm head...you could've easily escaped...b-baka..."

Gin knowingly smirked, his usual dead fish eyes twinkling with laughter. He heard a cough and turned his head to look at Otae, who shook her head with mirth, a slight smile on her pretty face.

He was slightly taken aback at a thought that had suddenly crossed his mind. He then spoken the thought aloud, forming it as a coherent statement. "Ne, Oogushi-kun, you player. I didn't know that you and the gori– Otae-san were close. On a date, are we?"

Hijikata stared at him like a he had suddenly sprouted tentacles on his head; Otae just stood there giggling. "I– What!? Who would take this gorilla woman out on a _date_!?" He lit up another cigarette after dropping the former cancer stick on the ground, not even bothering to put it out.

Gintoki felt the urge to stomp the cigarette into the ground. For some odd reason, he _wanted_ to be that cigarette: he WANTED to feel those scowl-induced lips on his own body.

_Shocker. I _am_ a pervert, after all. Can't I want those lips on my dick? Well, yes I can._

He smirked and stepped forwards, crushing the cigarette with his shoe. "You're gonna get your ass best now, Oogushi-kun. Have fun~" He stepped back just as Otae came flying, her feet connecting with Hijikata's handsome face, causing him to face plant head first into the ground.

Laughing, Gintoki padded off, not bothering to say goodbye, or good riddance; whichever it was, it didn't seem to matter. Neither one of the two idiots noticed him disappear.

* * *

Sougo grumbled incoherently as he stared impassively at Kondou. His eyes roamed around the room; he made sure to never make eye-contact with his commander. It wasn't that he was _avoiding_ Kondou– he actually was, but he'd never admit it– he just found it awkward to look at the man who'd openly kissed the Yorozuya.

_Danna, fuck you._

He had the urge to saunter over to Kondou and claim the gorilla of a man as his, but he needed to hold himself back. If he started to try and seduce the man out of nowhere, Kondou might get suspicious, if his mind wasn't wandering to places that children should never know of.

When he saw that Kondou was relaxed and more dazed than usual, Sougo smirked. He watched his boss out of the corner of his eye, his gaze trailing all over that delectably buff body.

In retrospect, Sougo had always felt _something_ for the older man. He certainly wasn't bi, and he definitely was not gay. He guessed that his interests had always been with the opposite sex. But, one day when he was out in the field, alone with Kondou, the stalker had somehow caught his interest.

He leaned against a wall and slid down it, sighing happily once he reached the hardwood floor.

Maybe his affections– he would _not_ call those feelings love– had perpetually been present with the older male, even if the guy was pretty perverted when he stalked that Shimura woman.

Naturally, Sougo still had sexual interest in women, even if he felt something more than just lust for Kondou. The farthest any of his relationships went was casual sex, and maybe a few dates here and there. Once in a while he'd end up having a one night stand with a stranger after getting wasted.

Every relationship he'd ever had had been more on the physical level, less on the emotional level. He wasn't proud to admit that he'd never shared more than unpremeditated sex with anyone.

Truth be told, he'd always seemed to crave more than just physical pleasure from partners. He wanted pleasure on an emotional level also. He wanted to love and be loved; he felt like such a hopeless romantic for even thinking that.

A vague feeling of pain fluctuated in his heart, sending small tremors of affliction throughout his body. He shut his eyes and listened to the sound of Kondou breathing.

He relaxed comfortably against the wall. He crossed his legs so that he sat Indian style, his mind wandering to ponder over his suspicion of the relationship between the commander and Danna.

He grit his teeth, his hand moving up to clutch the fabric of his clothing right over his heart.

_Too much pain...shit...it hurts...Kondou-san..._

* * *

Hijikata held the cup of coffee up to his lips. He frowned slightly when he took a sip, despising the fact that he'd forgotten to bring along a personal bottle of mayonnaise with him.

With a defeated sigh, he placed the coffee cup on the table. He then threaded his fingers together, setting his elbows on the glossy wooden table. He raised his eyebrows up, as if to say 'go on'. He winced slightly at the irritating pain above his eye.

Otae visibly grimaced and took a long gulp from her cool cup of tea. "Well, as I was saying, Kondou-san had been stalking me severely yesterday, and it made me so furious that I ranted and raved at him. I guess I insulted him too harshly, which probably had sent him into his little drunken stupor. But who knows..."

Hijikata groaned aloud. "What did you call him, Tae-san?"

The lovely, but violent, woman grimaced once again. "I, uhm, called him a faggot and told him to go off and fuck Gin-san. I mean, I knew that he'd been with Gin-san at least once, so I sorta started verbally attacking him, for reasons that you may know or you may not know."

"Tae-san," Hijikata hissed. "What do you MEAN the Yorozuya and Kondou-san have been _together_?"

"Oh? You didn't know?" She knowingly smirked. "I'd say that one night, while they both were drunk, they went out to a love hotel that a close friend of mine works at. She told me that they got a room and didn't come out till early in the morning. She also said that they both had a severe limp as they were leaving, haha." She then winked.

He glared, his anger brewing. "You mean they fucked all night long!? What kind of fuckin libido does the fuckin perm head _have_!?"

"That exactly what I was thinking! I mean, she's told me of all the flings he's brought there. I'm not even sure if he's realized he has somehow made a name of himself there! But, I'm pretty sure it doesn't matter, since it _is_ in the Okama slash gay district," she stated, her smirk turning into a slight sneer.

"...t'ch, I've always had my eyes set on him, and he turns out to be a fuckin queer...and he's even slept with the only guys who's shown true interest in me...bastard," she muttered to herself, her eyes blazing with rage.

Hijikata lifted his coffee to his lips. He tried to not meet her eyes, but somehow she'd attracted his gaze right back to her. "I don't know what to say, Tae-san...and you have an interest in in the Yorozuya?"

He knew his question was baseless and less tactic than he'd planned, but prying information from a woman _was_ a specialty of his, even if he wasn't as good at it as Sougo. His wound above his eye throbbed.

"Of course I do, idiot. Have you _seen_ him when he fights? Like, holy shit, man. That body. Hah, just thinking about it sets me on fire," she said, her eyes glazing over slowly with lust.

"I...ah...I must get going..." He carefully started to stand, the chair he was sitting in sliding back and grating along the floor annoyingly. "It...it was nice speaking with you, Tae-san."

He nonchalantly rubbed at the swollen mark right above his eye. He then swiftly walked away. Not wanting to get caught up in her horny moment.

Women sure were scary, he had to admit.

_Especially when they like the man I am attracted to...no. I'm not attracted to him and that's that._

* * *

**A/N**: **Time for replies to reviews! :D**

_karunebulous_: Yay! I'm so happeh I made your day! :D Reading awesome reviews makes my day, so I guess we're even, ehe. :3

I really love being able to make Gin-chan bi, though I'm not even sure if being with women suits him or not. I won't ever write him sleeping with a woman, just a heads up. XD

Oh yes, I shall make Zura piss off just about everyone in the Shinsengumi somehow, although I'm not sure if I want him to end up with Kondou, or some other character. Maybe the shogun? O.o where dafuq is my mind going? XD

And YESSSSS, I definitely plan on Gin-chan breaking his rules, I mean, if there're rules, why not break 'em? Haha ^_^

Sankyuu for reading and please continue! (~^3^)~

_Life Starts Forever_: I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter! And, as per usual, I hope you continue to read! :D

_higisune84tails_: I totally understand on the suprprise about Gin-chan and Kondou being together, but it's to be expected, especially since Gorilla-Tae keeps pushing poor Kondou away. D: though I have special plans for him, hehe. ;D

And Sougo might one day rape poor ol' Zura, or Kondou. I don't exactly have any big plans for them, unless maybe to get back at Gin-chan or Hijikata. Hopefully the pairing Sougo and Kondou will suffice though. *grins*

Gin-chan will forget the list sooner or later...probably when he's drunk off his ass and let's his emotions run wild and free. Next chapter maybe? XD

Thanks so much for reading, and you're very welcome for the quickie update. Please continue reading! *bows*

_KrazyStar_: Ehe, I really enjoyed writing the chapter, so I'm glad you thought it was fun! I really hope you enjoyed this current chapter! Please keep reading and thank you for the review! *peace out sign*

_KonKon_: if that update was fast, wait for the chapter after this one. It'll be out once I get back home, since I'll be writing it as I sit in a damn car for 5 or 6 hours.

I don't plan on having an Sougo x Zura in here; well, maybe a hint here and there. It's highly likely I'll be having Sougo f*cking Kondou soon enough, and Zura with some character. Likely the shogun. I mean, come on, the guy IS pretty hot in a weird sort of way.

And yes, I do plan on having Gin-chan breaking his numba two rule for Hijikata (le heart), but it may take a while. I wanna make either Gin-chan or Hijikata drunk for their first time together.

And yes, KonGin/GinKon was quite sudden, but I quite like their relationship. And I dislike Gorilla-Tae, so no harm done there. Kondou can just get over her and chase after Sougo *nosebleed* (Sougo will definitely NOT be ending up with Kagura any time soon)

Takasugi, aahhhh, Takasugi. In this current chapter, I made him pretty much molest poor Gin-chan just for the fun of it. Maybe there will be a threesome sometime in this story, though it'll probably be with Sougo x Kondou x Zura.

Omg, there's an idea! XD

Thank you so very much for reading and reviewing, it means so much and makes me smile. *grins*

_ValeHeart_: Yeah, although I don't think Gin-chan decisively rejects the opposite gender. I'm going to try and make him feel at least sexually attracted to women, though in my story all he's going to do is have sex with men. Simply, I suck at m/f sex. XD

Thank you so much for loving it, and no problems for 'shameless advertising'. I'd do the exact same if I ever reviewed any stories. (I just don't have the time, ehe) Gin-chan is such a playa, but he tops and bottoms in all of his loveless sexual relationships, though he's mainly seme in most of them.

****SLIGHT SPOILER ALERT****

In the next chapter, Gin-chan has the TALK with Hasegawa-san, so it clears up a bit of his sexual priorities, not much though.

I love Zura, but his main focus is to add angst and crap, except he will likely end up with so done soon enough. And Kondou and Gin-chan? Yes, yes that happened, surprising, but it did. I don't even know why I added that. Ex-tension maybe? Idk. And no, sadly, he doesn't do Sougo; I tried as best I could to explain Sougo's...feelings? Emotions? Love? Predicament?

I'm glad you liked it! Thank you so, so much for both reading and reviewing! Until next time! :3


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N**_: Hey, I said I would update in a few days, didn't I? So lookie here! Le update is here, and shorter than the previous chapter, you guys have something to look forward to!_

**A bit of GinHiji/HijiGin action! Yeaaaah! :D I hope y'all like it! (Sadly, not as much as I would have liked, but it's still there!)**

_Warning, not beta read, so any mistakes are mine. I apologize for the inconvenience! _

**Enjoy! ^^**

* * *

-_**Chapter Six**_-

* * *

_The night sky lit up with blazing explosions of light. Gintoki stood erect with his hands in his yukata as he stared up longingly at the lit up sky. His gaze traveled from the fireworks in the upper atmosphere downwards to the deep blue reflection of the sky on the water._

_A wry grin played on his lips, the water looking appealing in so many ways. There were multiple reasons why the river that lay out in front of him was entrancing._

_One reason was that across the river stood an adorable raven-haired vice commander, whom looked quite lonely. Another reason was that he could easily watch the male with out being caught; reflections sure did work in magical ways._

_And, like all magical wonders, the figure of Hijikata moved away from the water, making it so that Gintoki would not be able to watch him secretly. If the Mayora did it in purpose or not, Gintoki would never know._

* * *

"You're a terrible liar, you know," Sougo hummed, his body language lazy and unfocused as he stood in front of Katsura.

"I...no I'm not!" Katsura wiggled on the hard bench, his handcuffs rattling when he moved around. He glared defiantly at Okita, his eyes burning with fury.

Sougo just smirked leisurely, his eyes drooped into a dead fish eyes type of look, which made Zura stiffen up. The sadistic officer reminded Katsura of Gintoki in a creepy way.

Well, he had to admit that they both carried themselves with a nonchalant stature, they both had a sadistic nature(Sougo's sadism was a bit more in the physical department, and less in the mental/emotional area, unlike the Yorozuya), and they both stared at Hijikata with this _look_. Although, Gintoki looked at Hijikata with a more perverted gaze, while Sougo looked at Hijikata with anger and loathing.

"You are, Katsura Kotarou, you definitely are. Now, tell me about your..._relationship_ with Sakata Gintoki." Okita's smirk became a huge, sadistic grin that made Katsura shudder.

"You...what do you want to know...?"

* * *

Gintoki laughed whole-heartily, and then chugged down a large glass of sake. He slammed the cup down on the bar counter, his usual easy-going expression gone and replaced by a truly happy look that would make even Takasugi swoon.

He felt a hand touch his back, and he turned his head the side to find Hasegawa currently sitting next to him. "Oi, where'd you come from, Madao?"

"Hey hey hey, I've been here the whole time, and you finally notice me!? And I have to _touch_ you to get you to notice me?" Hasegawa shook his head, a crooked grin on his goateed face. "Damn, I had no idea you were _that_ gay."

"T'ch, I'm not _gay_. I'm _bi_. There's a difference. I _can_ have sex with women, ya know." Gintoki raised his glass to his lips. "...hah, though I prefer men in the long run. Women are just a pass time when I can't find a good piece of male ass..." He took a small sip from his drink.

Hasegawa huffed and growled, "There's not much of a difference, Gintoki. Either way, sex is sex, no matter the gender."

The silver-haired male shifted on his bar stool, sipping his sake more. "Pft, there _is_ a difference, damn it. Women are...well, they're women. Nothing different there between each and every one of them. But, with men, you can either be seme or uke, aka top or bottom. Though, I prefer being top in the long run."

Clutching his head, Hasegawa rested it on the counter. "Ugh, Gintoki, I did _not_ need to know _that_," he complained loudly.

"Hey, you _tried_ to keep up in this conversation, and you did quite well, buuuut, you'll never understand about being either gay or bi," Gin stated casually, his eyes twinkling ever so slightly. "So, you failed. Just like the madao you are."

Grumbling, said madao ordered himself a strong bottle of a foreign liquor, called 'tequila'. In Gin's opinion, it tasted disgusting as hell. If he wanted a foreign liquor, he would most likely choose vodka; he would never choose wine or beer, those were out of the question.

When the female bartender places the cool glass of fine tequila in front of Hasegawa, Gintoki took the chance to try and leave without paying. Which, of course, didn't work.

He was yanked back by his white, permy hair by a damned cook, who, actually, was way too buff to be a fucking cook. The hash slinger glared at him, muddy brown eyes showing no emotion.

The man was far from attractive. He had a receding hairline, gray hair, and a pointed nose that was defining for his too square jaw. His body wasn't bad, per se, it was just too bulky. His upper body was nicely toned and buff, while his lower body was pretty much all fat and blubber.

Gintoki grimaced at the sight. He would undeniably _not_ fuck the guy. _Ever_. The cook glowered down at him(he was genuinely much, much taller than Gin-san), his lips curling up into a angry sneer.

"How _dare_ you try to leave here without paying, bastard," the man half yelled, half growled. Other patrons started to watch the scene. "You will _not_ fucking leave until you pay!"

Gintoki raised his eyebrows at the man. "Don't tell me what to do, you pompous cock knob. The bartender lady will add it to my tab."

What Gin said passed right over the male's head, and his voice got louder and louder as he towered over the perm head. "**_Pompous cock knob_**!? How _dare_ you, fucking old fart!"

Said old fart looked him like, 'really? That's the best comeback you can come up with?' He then decides to rage at the man for pretty much insinuating that he was old.

"You bastard! I'm only 23," he huffed, his arms crossing in front of him.

"Does it really matter? Your hair is already going gray, so I mean...you must be getting old quickly," the hypocritical cook teased, his voice lower and much more calm than earlier. "Are you a smoker, by chance?"

Gintoki tensed up and gawked at the bastard. "Me? A _smoker_? Ha, as if. And if anyone is old, it's you, idiot. At least I don't have a receding hairline!"

"Re-receding hairline!? Don't bring MY hair into this. I'm 54, I have a _reason_ to be gray and balding; what's YOUR excuse for being a silver perm head?!," the cook bellowed, his voice cracking slightly. He looked as if he was about to cry.

But, Gintoki didn't back down, not giving a single fuck about the fact he was almost making an old guy _cry_. "Oi, it's not my fault I was born with this damn curly hair!"

"It's not the curly hair that makes you seem old, dumbass. It's the way you carry yourself, as if you've seen much more than a normal twenty three year old; and your white slash silver hair may have something to do with people thinking of you as an old bastard," the cook stated with a cocky smirk on his face.

The door of the bar suddenly slammed open, and a slightly drunk figure stumbled in. Blue eyes of a killer glared about the room, finally landing on the two arguing males. The intoxicated male grinned menacingly.

"W-w-well, isnnnn't it the fuckinnnn–" _hiccup_ "–Y-y-y-yorozuyaaaaa. Never expected to see _you_ here, yaaa–" _hiccup_ "–baaastaaard," Hijikata slurred drunkenly, arms now crossed in front of his chest sassily.

Why yes, the demon vice commander of the Shinsengumi had the vibe that he _would_ be sassy, and Gintoki groaned inwardly.

_I. Am. Totally. _Not_. In. The. Mood. To. Deal. With. A. Sassy. Oogushi-kun. I already have this bastard cook to reckon with. Shit._

* * *

Katsura sat cross legged on the floor, his position in the meditation position rather than the Indian style position. His eyes were shut as he concentrated wholeheartedly on meditating. It wasn't as if doing so would do him any good, but it still gave him peace of mind.

He flinched when a hand touched the top of his head, and he opened his eyes slowly. His head snapped up and he glared at the leering gaze he was receiving from that sadist Okita.

Zura raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow at the brunette. "Your gaze is creepy, Shogunate Dog," he hissed sharply.

Okita just smirked and started to stroke the top of Katsura's head leisurely, as if it was an everyday occurrence; as if they were as close as lovers and the moment was post-coital cuddling.

Whistling lowly, Sougo decisively plopped down next to the ronin's cross legged form. "I don't know what you mean, Yorozuya lover. If anyone's gaze is creepy, it's Danna's when he looks at Hijikata-san."

There it was. The hint that Okita wanted to speak of their recent conversation topic. He grimaced inwardly and sighed, running a stiff hand through his long, black locks.

They had a vague camaraderie when it came to Sakata Gintoki. Katsura wanted the perm head all to himself, while Sougo wanted to keep the Yorozuya _away_ from Kondou. Although, they both knew that at the moment Gintoki had his eyes set on Hijikata; which conveniently helped out Okita, but did nothing to help Katsura.

It irked Zura to no end to know that Gintoki had recently been with the commander of the Shinsengumi, and it really grated along his nerves when he knew that the whorish perm head was after another man when he could easily have Katsura all to himself.

With a grunt, he explained that, yes, Sakata _was_ interested in Hijikata Toushirou, it wouldn't last long, and that the perm head would tire quickly once he got what he wanted. It always happened, and, for some odd reason, he never once got bored of Katsura, but that could be because they'd originally been friends before they ever started their physical relationship.

Sougo stared at Katsura, eyes wide and surprised; quite different from his usual stoic and lazy expression. "You mean...he just _uses_ men for his own purposes? For his sexual relief and gratification? And he'd just...dispose of another human being once he's finished and bored?"

Katsura had to laugh at that. "Of course he does, it's the way he copes. I'm not sure WHO got him into using men, and sometimes women, as a way to deal with his past, but whoever did, well, I wanna kick their ass," he explained, his voice low and sad. "I've been his sex toy for at least two years, and I've seen him dump dozens upon dozens of men. He's a heartbreaker, sadly."

Sougo sat there, his body unmoving and his mouth gaping open. He should've expected that sort of answer. He'd done the same thing for a while there, but stopped immediately when he'd realized his feelings for Kondou.

"I...I shouldn't even be this surprised, but I am. I was like him once, but I reluctantly quit once I came to terms with my lo–" He rubbed a hand over his face. "–LIKE for Kondou-san. I mean, he's _older_ than me, and he's STILL using others to relive his pain!? He's a fucking _child_ for still doing that."

Zura tensed up at those words, his mind whirling. He really _wanted_ to defend Gintoki, but he couldn't, since everything Okita said _was_ true. He scratched his neck awkwardly, and reluctantly nodded his head in agreement.

"Katsura Kotarou, Danna doesn't deserve someone like you."

* * *

Gintoki flung himself into his couch, not bothering to invite Hijikata in, considering the asshole was drunk and wouldn't give a single fuck about whether or not he was invited in anyway. He covered his eyes with his arm, and he could just imagine the huff and angry look on the Mayora's face as he stepped into the living area/office of Gintoki's home.

He felt the air _whoosh_ by him as Hijikata passed, so he reached out with his other arm and grabbed Hijikata's hand. "Ne, Oogushi-kun, where're you going?"

Hijikata's hand twitched, and he slurred, "You...you areee a fuc–" _hiccup_ "–kinnnnn moronnnn, aincha, Yorozuyaaa." _hiccup_ "Imagointotabathroom!" And with one last hiccup, the Mayora hurriedly stumbled out of the room, aiming for the bathroom.

The Yorozuya just chuckled and leaned up onto his elbows. He took in the fact that Kagura and Sadaharu weren't around, which was a good thing in his opinion, and grinned.

Maybe, just maybe, he could seduce the raven haired vice commander, and welcome him into his bed. But, that possibility was highly unlikely. Gin knew that Hijikata would easily knock him out before ever submitting to him, or, in vulgar terms, the Mayora would kick his ass before Gintoki could pound away into that perfectly shaped ass.

Or maybe he could have Hijikata pound away into HIS ass. It wouldn't really matter to him wither way who would top and who would bottom. In a way, they were both manly men, so taking the reins in their sex life would be a competition. And Gintoki loved a good competition when it came to topping and bottoming.

Gintoki stripped off his yukata and shirt, leaving only his pants on.

A door slammed open, Hijikata appearing looking flustered. And weak. And powerless.

Gintoki gaped at the intoxicated figure, taking in the adorable way he held onto the shoji. He resisted the urge to jump up and cuddle into the Mayora's body.

Hijikata interrupted his thoughts by grumbling, "Damn...fuggin fergot my cigarettes..." For some reason, his slurring was different than it was a few minutes prior. Was he sobering up, maybe? If so, it wouldn't do Gintoki any good if he pounced on the Mayora when he was steadying himself from his earlier alcohol drinking,

"Oi, Oogushi-kun, what's wrong with your voice?" Hijikata just laughed and made his way over to Gintoki, his skin flushed a darling shade of pink.

"Weeeeellllll," he drawled out, "I miiiiight be sobering up, but that doesn't mean that I can't staaaaayyyyyy at least a biiiit drunk, amiright?"

A hand trailed down Gin's chest, stopping at his navel, and then trailed back up. This time when the hand moved down his chest, nails lightly scraped down as well, eliciting a groan from the Yorozuya.

"Hah, Oogushi-kun...what are you...nn...doing?" He shifted so that he reclined on the back of the couch, Hijikata sitting neatly in his lap after being toppled onto Gintoki.

Those devilish fingers continued to scratch lines down his chest, and moans continuously left his mouth, some of them ending in whimpers. He did always like a little pain with his pleasure.

"I'm tryin to seduce you, dumbass. I've _always_ wanted to do thiiiiis," Hijikata hissed as he ground his groin against the Yorozuya's own, fingers now splayed over Gintoki's heart.

All Gin can do is sit there and relish in the feeling of Hijikata grinding himself into his groin, his already half hard cock springing up into full hardness, straining against his tight pants.

Suddenly the movement stops, and Gintoki finds himself with a lap full of unconscious Hijikata. He sighs and moves around so that the Mayora is facing the coffee table with Gintoki spooning him.

The Yorozuya shuts his eyes, ignoring the painfully RAGING hard-on, and fall into a blissful, dreamless sleep. A sleep that he hasn't had in a long, _long_ time.

* * *

**A/N**: **Once again, review replies! ^^ **

_Guest_: There probably will be a threesome, though I'm not so sure about Takasugi x Gintoki x Hijikata, aha. It's a possibility though! :3 Thanks for reading and reviewing! ^w^

_Karunebulous_: Howdy! I'm glad you were satisfied and happy about this update! I wasn't sure if anybody would like it, since I had no Internet to help with my research, haha. (I'm very forgetful XD)

Anyways, I also ship Gin-chan with his harem, and I'll bring them in soon enough to help sh*t hit the fan. ^^

And, I love love love Okita and Kondou together, like, they're indefinitely perfect for each other! Sougo's a sadist and Kondou's a masochist(in a way), so their relationship works pretty well, other than Gorilla-Tae steals Kondou from Sougo. TTnTT and guess who is top in their relationship, it's definitely NOT Kondou, aha. XD

I totally agree with you on TakaGin, though I pretty much ship Gin-chan with just about anyone. I don't know why, just do, so making him a whore helps me make my fantasies a sort of reality. X3 and yeah, Takasugi probably will end up being the one who stole Gin-chan's virginity, ass and all. Maybe I'll make a one shot of each of his conquests, haha.

Hijikata does have tons upon tons of competition, but it'll be funnyish competition, less drama. (Maybe o.o) I'm not the biggest of Gorilla-Tae, so having her be totally captivated by Gintoki and providing information for Hijikata will also help sh*t hit the fan. Yay! XD

Eh, not too much friction with Hasegawa, sadly. I wanna make at least one male character not want to bend over and drop his pants for Gintoki, and besides, I actually like the madao's wife, so I don't want to help end that relationship, even if it's pretty much dead anyways. :P

And, as you can see above, the update has been made! :D I'm glad you liked, I'm glad you read, and I'm glad you reviewed! ^w^

_Life Starts Forever_: Aw yeah, mild GinHiji action this chapter! I hope you liked! Thank you so so much for reading and reviewing! :3

_higitsune84tails_: Haha, I'm glad you're glad that I updated so quickly, and I understand about it being late and crap. Happens to me all the damn time, I'm just glad you left me a review! :)

I also love the pairing Sougo x Kondou, and since I do want to write a threesome sometime in this fic, I'll probably just make Sougo x Zura x Kondou happen, hehe. Threesomes are, like, the best. Especially double penetration ;D

Hm, I've never thought about Kondou x Shinpachi, could give it a try if Sougo x Kondou doesn't work out...hmmmmmm. XD

And you're very welcome, I love love love replying to all reviews. I wasn't sure if I should in the beginning, so it took me a while to do so, but now it's one of my favorite parts of my story! ^^

Sankyuu so very much for enjoying and reviewing! Until next time! *waves* OuO


	8. Chapter 7

_**A/N**_: _Hey guys, another quickie is here! Well, I see it as a quickie, anyways. Aha. Longer, about 4000 words, so yeah! Haha. Sorry if some characters are OOC, or if I confused you at Sa-chan's part._

**I'll quickly mention that I still don't exactly have a beta. Meh. So I apologize for grammar mistakes, spelling errors, and if nothing is worded prettily.**

_Not many GinHiji moments, sorry about that. Although, there is a but of somewhat eye-fucking. really it couldn't really be classified that, but oh well._

**Enjoy! ^^**

* * *

-**_Chapter Seven_**-

* * *

Rain hit the window with a _pitter_ _patter_ rhythm. Hijikata snuggled into the warmth of something, nuzzling his face into a smooth, warm area of skin.

_Skin? Not a blanket? _

He cracked his eyes open, and found himself curled up into the body of the damn Yorozuya. He blinked once, then twice, and finally struggled out of Gintoki's warm embrace. Before he even realized he was on a couch, he toppled over and landed head first on the floor, his ass up.

He heard a groan above him, then the rustling of clothes, and conclusively the annoying, lazy voice of Sakata Gintoki.

"Eh...Oogushi-kun? Why's your ass there? Want me to fuck it for ya?" Hijikata tensed up and grabbed the edge of the coffee table, pulling himself up with little trouble.

"T'ch, as if, bastard. I'm not some woman who'd bend over just so you can fuck 'er senseless," he bit out, his face slightly red from anger and embarrassment.

He stood up straight, brushing off imaginary dust from his outfit, which wasn't his usual uniform. He was suddenly completely and utterly confused. Why the hell wasn't he in his Shinsengumi attire!? He moved around so that he sat on the couch opposite Gintoki, glaring angrily at the perm headed bastard.

"Why the fuck am I at your place anyway, Yorozuya!?" He was not just angry, he was fucking furious. And confused, must not forget confused; but mainly he was just furious.

Gintoki clicked his tongue and gave Hijikata this _look_ that made his blood run cold. "You were drunk, Oogushi-kun. I brought you here before you either passed out, like your commander, or made a complete fool of yourself, like your commander," he deadpanned, a wry grin playing on his lips.

With tension rolling throughout is body, Hijikata laced his fingers together and leaned back, eyebrows raised. "And, if I may ask, what did I do after you brought me here? I must not have been _that_ drunk, considering I don't have a hangover and I'm not buck ass naked."

"Well, Mayora, you were sobering up before you ever passed out, but you were still tipsy enough to start hitting on me." The smirk Gintoki sent Hijikata made goose bumps emerge all along his body. The Yorozuya motioned to long, thin, pink lines on his chest that the Mayora didn't even notice until then.

"I...wait. I did _that_?! To _you_?!" He felt his face grow hot, and he knew his face was bright red by the way Gintoki continued to smirk at him.

At that instant, he got his bearings and replaced his embarrassment with cold harshness. "Why would I _ever_ do _that_ to you? That's just so damn disgusting. You're not even a woman, I would never lay a single finger on you," he said coldly. "Disgusting. Absolutely _**disgusting**_."

* * *

Gintoki stood out in the rain, thumbing through the previous week's edition of _JUMP_. He whistled lowly at an epic fight scene and flipped to the next page, skimming over the words and drawings.

He was trying to distract himself; he was trying to stop himself from sinking into a depression from his hurt ego.

How _dare_ Hijikata tell him that HE was disgusting! Hijikata was the one that was trying to sleep with him the nit before, even if he was in a drunken state of mind. It wasn't as if Gintoki had _tried_ to bring the damn Mayora to his bed. He was taking his time with the bastard, and getting insulted was how he was repayed?!

At least I didn't try to fuck him into oblivion! Many men such as myself would've taken the chance and bent him over a table to pound into that perfect ass!

With an exasperated groan, Gintoki placed the _JUMP_ back in its rightful place, since he didn't have the correct amount of money for it at the moment. He made a mental note to bring money next time and buy it before some random ass kid stole it.

He turned to leave, but ran into the perpetually well-toned body of Hattori Zenzou, the mother fucking bangs and scarf ninja. "Oioioioi, what the hell, man!?"

He glowered at the blue body suit warning ninja, his anger faltering when he noticed a small smile on the man's lips. "Eh? Why're you smil–"

He was cut off by Zenzou leaning in and biting his earlobe lightly, sending sparks of pleasure down south. "H-haaaaah...Y-you–"

Once again he was cut off, this time by a hand moving down to his crotch, cupping the hardening bulge there. His face and neck must've been flushed with arousal, because he heard a low chuckle come from the ninja currently groping him.

"Hey, babe, want to relocate and reacquaint ourselves with each other's bodies? Hm," he murmured into his ear, blowing softly after his words.

Zenzou was one of the few men whom Gintoki actually allowed to top him, since the guy had severe hemorrhoid problems, and it wouldn't turn out too well if someone fucked him in the ass. So, in a way, their relationship only went one way, and Gintoki was the damn ninja's bitch.

When Gintoki seemed to be deciding whether or not to do so, Zenzou added, "I'll buy you that _JUMP_, if you want."

It was possible that the goateed ninja was trying to buy him, and under normal circumstances Gintoki would have allowed that treatment, but he was trying to woo another man; he didn't need to be known as a common street whore, in case Hijikata heard and actually believed rumors.

Anger burned in his chest at the thought of his Oogushi-kun thinking of him like that, even though he figured it was highly probable he already thought that. He wrenched himself away from Zenzou and spat out, "Fuck no. I'm not in the mood to play around with the likes of _you_."

And with that, he stormed off and away from the now depressed ninja.

In the background, he could actually hear the annoying little laugh that the masochist ninja Sa-chan always did when he rejected someone. He grinned and laughed inwardly.

* * *

Katsura's stomach churned as he took tiny bites of the disgusting jail food that he was forced to eat while he was held prisoner. He ground his teeth together, shoving the wretched food away from himself.

The jail cell door slammed open, Hijikata storming in, eyes fiery and quite scary. Zura grimaced at the sight.

He really shouldn't scowl like that. It ruins his naturally handsome looks. T'ch, as if I care. Gintoki is the only one that probably gives a single shit about this bastard's looks.

Sighing, Katsura put on a fake smile. "Ah, hello, Hijikata-san. Fine day, isn't it?"

"Shut your trap, Katsura Kotarou," Hijikata bit out. He pulled out a pack of cigarettes, grabbed a stick, put it in his mouth, and lit up. He took a deep drag, eyes shut as he breathed out the noxious smoke into the cell.

Zura scrunched up his nose at the smell and fake coughed, which seemed to piss the demon vice commander off severely. The short haired male kicked the bench the longer haired male sat on, causing the latter to topple over onto the floor.

As he sat on the cold, hard floor, he felt himself nearly tear up. If this was how he'd continue to be treated, then he'd preferably just go to a real jail, instead of staying at the headquarters. He truly wanted Gintoki to hurry up and rescue him, but since the perm head seemed to be awestruck with Hijikata, Katsura probably would not be broken out anytime soon, unless Elizabeth _payed_ the Yorozuya bunch to come and get him out.

He grumbled incoherent curses under his breath, his nose still scrunched up from the pungent smell of cigarette smoke. He quickly stood up and stalked over to the form of Hijikata.

He grabbed the cancer stick, threw it to the ground, and crushed it under his shoe. "Haaaah, much better," he exhaled happily.

"You sonofabitch! How _dare_ you! That was my _last_ fuckin cigarette," Hijikata hissed at him. Katsura noted dully that the demon vice commander was certainly not happy that his cigarette had been crushed. But what could Katsura do?

He deadpanned, "What's done is done." With a wry grin, he took a seat on the bench once again, fixing his long hair as he did so.

Hijikata then went on a rage about how people shouldn't crush other people's nicotine fixes, even if the smell got to one particular person. "It's damn rude, I say. Damn fuckin rude!"

"It's also 'damn rude' to light one up before even asking the occupants of the room if it's all right," Katsura stated bluntly.

"I could care _less_ about what people think! It's my fuckin _right_ to smoke where I want!" Hijikata fiddled with his lighter as he talked, the opening and closing of it grating along the long haired ronin's nerves.

"And it's my right to do what I want to another person as long as it doesn't harm others." Katsura grit his teeth as he waited for the blue eyed male's reply.

"You have no rights, shit face! You're in _jail_. You're a shitty criminal, so all your rights have gone out the window once you've been caught," Hijikata yelled, shoving his lighter into his pocket. His hand moved towards the hilt of his sword. "And you have no right to say otherwise."

Katsura's asshole puckered at the thought of having no rights at all, and having to deal with this bastard daily. He shuddered inwardly; finally he resided in that fact

He gazed right at Hijikata, and said, "I gotta take a dump."

* * *

Sarutobi Ayame, known as Sa-chan to most, laced her fingers together, and rested her chin atop them. She stared into the big, brown eyes of Shimura Tae, whom looked much more pissed off than usual.

"Hah, Otae-chan, why're your panties in a bunch? Ya need to relaaaax!" She giggled, her usual red glasses moving down to the tip of her nose. She quickly pushed them up, and then went back to her previous position.

"Shut it, Sa-chan, I'm not in the mood. What did you need to talk to me about?" Otae questioned, her left eyebrow twitching erratically, Sa-chan noted.

"Oh~ I just wanted to give you the newest, juicy gossip update on Gin-san~" She giggled once again, her cheeks slightly flushed.

Otae just glared. "What new 'juicy gossip'!? What did Gin-san do _this_ time, and by what did he do, I mean _who_ did he do?"

"Oh, Otae-chan, you made a funny~!" She shifted her position so that her head lay on her right hand, an undignified look for a young lady, but who actually gave a shit?

Nonetheless, Sa-chan was relatively bored with the conversation already. She'd informed the old witch, that whore Tsukuyo, and that brat Kyuubei earlier, so Otae was the last to know, since she _was_ the one harem girl who was waaaay too obsessed with Gintoki; even more obsessed than Sa-chan, which was surprising.

Suppressing a yawn, she stared at Tae with an utmost bored expression. "Gin-san _rejected_ Zenzou, which was quite the ego deflator for the poor man. I actually felt bad for him, well, not really, considering he's been with _**our**_ Gin-san many times in the past." She lifted her left hand and stared at the perfectly filed nails lazily.

"Eh?" Otae blinked. "_Eh_?" She blinked once more. "**_EEEEEHHHHH_**!?" She flung herself over the table and grabbed ahold of Sa-chan, who still looked bored and lazy. "You– What?! He...he actually said _no_ to Zenzou-san?! I– I've never heard such blasphemy!"

"It's the truth, Otae-san. I saw it with my own eyes." Sa-chan carefully removed Otae's fingers from her neat outfit. She then tapped her nails against the hard wood of the table they sat at.

"Are you...are you absolutely positive!? I– I mean...Gin-san would never usually reject a chance to bed another man, even if it _is_ Zenzou! Are you sure your glasses hadn't fallen off or something?!" Otae was in hysterics.

Sa-chan was getting annoyed. Well, she'd already been annoyed, but had passed it off as boredom and laziness. In actuality, she was in just as much shock as Otae, maybe even more so. But, that didn't really matter at the moment; it didn't matter that, in some weird way, it _hurt_ to see Gintoki reject someone other than herself. She'd become used to it, in a sense. So, seeing him publicly push away a suitor, and Zenzou at that, it had sent so many bucketfuls of pain though her veins. Maybe it was because she'd thought she was special; she'd thought that she'd been the only he would ever reject.

Thinking she was special actually helped relieve the pain, so when he tossed someone else away, it took her specialness away from her. She grit her teeth in annoyance.

"Oi, I'm telling the god forsaken truth! Why would I _lie_ about this!?" She half yelled, half screeched at Otae, her blood boiling with rage and hurt. "You know, I truly thought that I was the only one he'd ever reject, and now that he's pushed away another, well, it hurts too damn much. Now shut the fuck up and let that damn gossip sink in!"

Sa-chan stood up and stalked out of the diner, purple hair flowing along after her.

* * *

Okita sat cross legged in a swivel chair, sword laying neatly in his lap. He stared at the shiny metal, a sly smirk playing on his lips. If he could do anything at the moment with his sword, what would he do?

Well, the most logical thing he could do would be cut down any one person that tried to kill his boss. But, since Kondou knew what he was doing, even if he was a dumbass most of the time, Sougo figured he wouldn't need to kick ass just to save the man he lo– _liked_.

Another thing he could do, although it wouldn't be very logical, would go to Katsura Kotarou's cell and piss off the pretty, long-haired male. Or, if Hijikata was there, he could challenge him to a duel of sorts, just to clear his head.

He leaned back in his seat, swiveled around to face his desk. He placed his sword down, and then swiveled back around. He could use his free time to flir– _mess_ with Kondou, or he could fathead and interrogate Katsura.

Anything was possible, it seemed. He felt as if he could do **_anything_**. Yeah, he was in _that_ good of a mood.

* * *

Hijikata strolled leisurely along through the run down part of Edo, his black yukata, comforting and unsuspecting, hung loosely on his well-built but thin frame. He wouldn't be so skinny if he ate more, but his appetite had taken a sudden drop, so he didn't eat as much as he would've liked. Truth be told, he loved food _too_ much, but as of late, nothing appealed to him in the food category, even with mayonnaise on it.

Reluctantly, he reached into the folds of his yukata, pulling out a fresh packs of cigarettes. He grabbed one, top stuck it in his mouth, found his lighter, lit up, and took a deep, long drag.

He relished in the feeling of the nicotine slithering throughout his body; it was so damn amazing. He blew out a puff of smoke, smirking inwardly when he received looks of disgust from multiple men and women.

Well, what was he expecting? Only fellow smokers understood the enjoyment of having a nicotine fix, so it was quite understandable that non-smokers despised smoking, even if it wasn't affecting them.

Choosing to ignore the piss-faced onlookers, Hijikata smiled to himself. He was relatively glad that he had the rest of the day off, on account of the fact that he'd nearly strangled Katsura Kotarou; the man had been a whiny bitch, more so than usual, Hijikata considered(who knew how much of a 'bitch' Katsura was in bed, probably a submissive little bitch at that).

He ran a hand over his face, and, with a defeated sigh, walked into a little bar that he frequented whenever he was in the slums of Edo. He grabbed a table in a corner, then quickly motioned a plump, and fairly cute, waitress over.

He smiled handsomely, using his natural good looks to his advantage. Maybe he could get a free bottle of sake, or even a free serving of dango with mayonnaise all over them.

His smile seemed to have worked, because the waitress blushed and giggled, asking in a flirtatious way, "What would ya like ta eat, darlin'?"

Hijikata grimaced inwardly at her trying-to-be-cute way of talking, and replied in a calm and collected manner. "Hah, one bottle of sake, with a side of mayonnaise covered onigiri." He took a long drag of his cancer stick, waiting for that hilarious reaction he always received from the people who served him.

The waitress flinched at his side order and nodded, hurrying away, probably just to inform her coworkers of their customer's weird taste in food. He didn't even notice his cigarette burn out as he watched her go.

He laughed to himself, shaking his head as he did. It was a usual, and fairly normal, reaction to his..._different_ tastes. He was used to it, so whenever he got a humorous reaction, he brushed off the looks of disgust and laughed.

He shifted in his seat, chewing on the filter of his now burnt out cigarette. He stretched himself, fairly long legs touching the chair in front of him.

As he yawned, a different waitress strutted over and placed his order down in front of him. This waitress looked much too thin to be healthy. Even her hair and skin looked flaky, as if she was literally _starving_ herself. It was sickly.

"...so unhealthy," he murmured to himself as she strutted off. He guessed she saw herself as the prettiest most perfect woman in Edo, so being over the top thin and snobbish(well, he was guessing she was a snob, since she didn't say anything or even acknowledge he existed) could be expected from her.

He turned his attention to his meal, nodding his approval at the fair amount of mayonnaise on his onigiri. He grabbed the sake bottle and took a swig from it. He slammed the bottle down, took one of the rice balls, and took a large bite from it, groaning his approval as he swallowed.

With practiced ease, Hijikata ate his onigiri and drank his sake in under 5 minutes, laughing inwardly at the shocked faces of the waitresses and other patrons. He pushed his plate away and stood. He padded towards the register at the front of the bar, paying quickly, then taking his time at leaving.

He winked creepily at his first waitress as he passed her, and felt the urge to flip off the second waitress, but decided against it when she gave him a death glare.

Once he was out of the bar, Hijikata stifled a yawn and decisively made his way down the dirt road of the slums. He made himself more comfortable in his yukata by doing what Gintoki did; he pulled his arm into the yukata, leaving the sleeve hanging there, and rested it on the obi sash he wore around his waist, while his hand hung out the opening.

Anyway, he made his way toward that old bat(the one who collected rent from Gin)'s bar. Yeah, he'd just left a bar, and now he was going to _another_ bar. He was a bit of a drunk, he had to admit.

Finally reaching _**OTOSE'S SNACK HOUSE**_, he took a deep drag of a cigarette he'd lit recently, barely suppressing the groan he felt from the nicotine soothing his system. He entered the bar, sincerely hoping that he wouldn't run into the damn Yorozuya bunch(mainly Gintoki, he didn't really mind the children).

* * *

Flicking a booger across the room, Gintoki twirled round and round in his swivel chair. He stopped suddenly when he noticed a familiar form walking towards Otose's bar-diner-thing(he could never figure out what the hell it was exactly).

A happy grin plastered itself on his face; he hopped off of his swivel chair and hurried out of his home, rushing down the stairs that led to the front door of the snack house.

Entering the nearly barren bar, he took in the three lone figures in the darkened room. One form was Hijikata, the second was Otose, and the third was someone Gintoki _really_ didn't want to see at the moment.

Purposefully ignoring the third person, Gin strode over to the Mayora. "Ne, what a surprise, Oogushi-kun. You're here at the bar quite early– the sun hasn't even set yet," he jeered, his usual lazy expression ever-so-expertly placed on his face.

"Shut it, perm headed Yorozuya. I came to drink, since I have the rest if the day off, and it's nearing sunset, anyways. It shouldn't fuckin matter," Hijikata growled, then took a swig of a glass of beer in front of him. Gintoki made a face at the rotten-sweet smell that permeated the air around the dark haired male.

"Hah, so I'm gonna take a guess here, but Zura's pissin ya off, isn't he?" He raised his eyebrows at the handsome, blue-eyed male, who nearly spit out his beer, his facial expressions ranging from horrified to rage to something Gin didn't recognize.

"Y-you...you're actually...correct," Hijikata huffed out, his expression finally settling on looking ruffled but not angry.

Gintoki patted the Mayora's head teasingly and took a seat next to him. Otose glared at him, raising a perfectly sculpted brow at him(she was old but she somehow _always_ had perfect eyebrows).

"Brat, you better not order anything, especially since you haven't paid rent yet this month," she stated apathetically; she'd find a way to get him to pay one way or another, so being pissed at the moment would do her no good, especially when he wouldn't even pay attention to her when a man was around, even if it was the demon vice commander.

Sighing, Gin waved her words away, barely any mind to the look she gave him. He was more interested in the way Hijikata's cheeks started turning red after each drink from his glass of beer. Momentarily, the glazed over blue eyes bore into his own wine colored ones.

He gulped nervously at the look he was receiving; it was one of love and need, a look Gintoki always made sure to avoid if possible, but at the moment, he couldn't deny the fluttering of his heart and the coil of heat in his belly.

"Huh, this is new," he said to himself, ignoring the annoyed look Otose sent him and the jealous look the third lone figure glared at him.

* * *

Takasugi had his hair pulled up in a rather shitty looking thing of a ponytail. He wore thick rimmed glasses low on his nose, along with a fake bushy goatee on his chin. His outfit was one of a normal business man, not his usual butterfly yukata he always wore.

He watched carefully as Gintoki sat next to that man Hijikata, their conversation cut short when the old woman working the bar interrupted them to nag at the perm head. Once her nagging ended, her sharp eyes moved to him, a dark look set in her eyes.

Takasugi made sure to avoid those eyes if possible, hoping that the cat woman would come out to bring him his order of _umeboshi_* and rice. He stared longingly at the back of Gintoki's head, a soft sigh resounding in his area of the bar.

He figured that maybe, just maybe, he could mess up the infatuation Hijikata seemed to have with Gin. But how he would do so, he wasn't sure.

Katsura would be of use to me right now...

_**Katsura**_. Perfect, just who he needed to bash those feelings into the ground. He grinned maliciously at the thought.

The cat woman walked over and set his _umeboshi_ and rice in front of him.

* * *

_***Umeboshi: Umeboshi are pickled ume fruits common in Japan. The word "umeboshi" is often translated into English as "Japanese salt plums," "salt plums" or "pickled plums."**_

* * *

_**A/N: **__**ahahaha, once again, mothafuckin replies! Sorry for any ramblings! ^^**_

_Kiyomi di Vongola_: haha, why yes they have! ^w^

_karunebulous_: Yo!

Ehe, I know. Madao being with Gin-chan doesn't suit my tastes. I see them as just friends; best friends maybe, but lovers? Heck no. Their relationship is purely platonic in my eyes, and will stay that way throughout the story, unless Gin-chan needs help to get Hijikata jealous.

I feel indefinitely sorry for Zura, but I'll try to make him happy soon enough. He just needs to get over Gin-chan and move on to better relationships. And Sougo, oh Sougo, he really helped out in the chapter, so I plan on giving him more screen time soon enough. Just not this current chapter, he just has very little screen time.

I love Hijikata the drunk, but I must admit, he'll be back and forth between the lines of honesty and lying. I'll probably have some Tosshi reflectiveness soon enough, just for shits and giggles. :3

I'm glad you enjoyed, even if it was a short chapter, haha. I'll try to make them longer, but mowing myself, I'll end up procrastinating or getting off track and end up make it short as hell. Eh, what can I do? XD

Sankyuu so much for reading, enjoying, and taking the time out of your day to review! 'Til next time! ^^

_Life Starts Forever_: :D I'm glad you liked it! And I apologize for there not being too much GinHiji lovin in this current chapter, just some type of eye fucking, maybe? I'm not sure what to call it, haha!

Thank you for reading and reviewing! Bye bye for now! ^^

_ValeHeart_: Haha, I totally understand you there. Big GinHiji fan right here, but I see them switching positions, since they're both "macho men" in a certain sense. Equality in there sex life, I guess. :P

I have to agree with you there. I had to choose between spooning or just dumping him on the floor and jerk off. But, if he did drop him, I can see Hijikata kicking the shit out of Gin-chan, and maybe harming poor Gin-chan's schlong.

Of course everyone wants Gin-chan, he's just...*drools* Haha XD Even Zenzou wants him, as explained in this current chapter. ^^

Cuteness is my forte! Not really, I'm just a big fluff-o-maniac, so their relationship will probably end up being the most fluffiest and lemony thing I have ever written. X3

:D Glad you liked it enough to review, thank you. Until next time! OuO

_KonKon_: Ohayo!

I'd have to say that Sougo will be trolling Zura most of the time, but the topic of conversation was a sore spot for Sougo, so he opened up. I'll go into more detail about his past soon enough. And I apologize for the OOCness, he'll be back to his apathetic and trolling self soon enough, haha. ^^

In most senses, I would make Sougo be with Zura, but I really wanna make the SougoKondou pairing happen. Maybe it'll be a three-way love or something later on? I mean, they'll end up all loving each other equally, yada yada yada.

Haha, Elizabeth will be making an appearance soon enough, :3 can't wait to play around with Elizabeth to make shit hit the fan more.

I enjoy TakaGin to a certain degree, same with all the other pairings with Gin-chan in the midst if then such as ZenzouGin, GinKon, etc etc.

Ahahah, I agree with you totally about Hasegawa. Totally not lover-type, more creepy stalker man of his waifu. XD

Omg, and the GinHiji moment, you have no idea how much I wanted to end the chapter with some lemony action. It was so hard, almost as hard as Gin-chan's schlong. XD well, I guess in a sense, it he just tossed Hijikata down, he'd end up with something broken or bruised. ^^

Tsukuyo will come in soon enough, well, as soon as I can fit her in. Sa-chan was at least introduced, along with Otose. Gin-chan's harem will help Hijikata in many, many ways. ;D

And the shogun, sheesh, I find his vaguely attractive; I'd probably consider him my OTL if I didn't already love Takasugi so much, aha. XD To put it simply, Takasugi shall be the antagonist, in a sense. :P Also, I totally love the idea of the actual shogun ending up with a Joui member! Imagine the horror on Gin-chan's face if he ever walks in on Zura getting fucked by the shogun. Oh god. *laughing*

Sankyuu so so so much for reading and reviewing! Until next time! ^w^


	9. Chapter 8

**_A/N_**: _Hm, hm? Update! Haha! This chapter pretty mucforces nowhere, in my opinion, but alas, you get to see Takasugi dress up as a woman! And tie up Zura! And a dream! GinHiji moment! _

**Oh myyyy. Also, there is quite a bit of OOCness present in this chapter, in my opinion, anyways. **

_I apologize beforehand for any grammatical/spelling errors that you'll probably see, knowing me. Beta still not in contact. Probably won't have a beta for awhile. Meeeeh._

**Sankyuu for reading, I hope you enjoy! ^^**

* * *

-**Chapter Eight**-

* * *

To be truthful, it took Takasugi three days to finally figure out how to break Katsura out of the Shinsengumi HQ. He'd went over many different types of situations in his head, until he came to the conclusion that the only way to break Zura out would be just to wing it after his infiltration.

Yeah, three whole fucking days to figure _that_ out.

Takasugi sighed and rubbed his non-covered eye. His covered eye was currently not wrapped up with his annoying, usual wrappings; instead there was an eyepatch, similar to the one Katsura wore when he went into **_Captain Katsura_** mode.

Crossing his arms, he strode along in front of the headquarters. He wore a wig, a long blond one that made him seem like a girl, and a strikingly pink kimono. He had fake breasts bouncing up and down as he walked around randomly. Damn, they were really pissing him off.

_Let's just get this over with..._

Decisively, Takasugi padded up to the front doors of the HQ, a fake smile gracing his lips. Early on in his planning, he'd decided to dress as a hook– _woman_. Batting his eyelashes of his one good eye, he knocked on the large wooden door.

He wouldn't just barge in; that would be excessively rude, and he wanted to make a good impression on whomever answered the damn door. His right hand twitched at the thought of blowing up the whole building, but held back.

He needed to get Katsura out. Besides, he considered himself to be on a sort of vacation, so it wouldn't do him any good to actually work. Anyway, if he did succeed to getting Zura out, then he'd be able to mess with the vice commander of the Shinsengumi, and that would be good enough for the time being.

After waiting for what felt like hours, a plain looking male opened the large door. "Mm? Yes, what do you need?"

Still batting his eyelashes, Takasugi reached out and touched the man's forearm lightly. "Might I speak with..." He paused for a moment, thinking of the person's exact name. "...Kondou Isao? And if he's busy, may I speak with Hijikata Toushirou, ne?"

The boring-looking male sighed, nodded, and opened the door wide. "Yes, yes. Come in. But, before I allow you inside, can I have your name? I can't just allow some unknown woman in here without at least a name."

Takasugi's right eyebrow twitched, and he replied in a girly, flirtatious voice, "Oho, I'm Takahashi Shio~ and what might be your name, handsome~?"

The male flinched at the fake and sugary coating of his words. "Ah...I'm Yamazaki. No need to know my given name. Now come along, Takahashi-san."

"Ehhh, Yamazaki-saaaan, no need to use honorifics! Just call me Shio-chwaaaan~," he giggled out, his mind yelling at him for even speaking like that.

_Shit, this is so fuckin degrading._

"...okay then. Shio-'chwaaaan'. Better?" Takasugi nodded at him. "Good, now let's get you to Hijikata-san. I apologize sincerely, but Kondou-san is busy with...something else at the moment. You might be able to speak with him later, if you stay long enough."

As they walked down the long corridors, Takasugi took the time to look about, making mental notes about good places to stash bombs and such. He inwardly grimaced when Yamazaki stopped in front of a door that reeked cigarette smoke.

He made sure to not cough, as in not so piss off the demon vice commander. Yamazaki opened the door, motioning for Takasugi to enter first. He complied and sauntered in, doing his best to shake his ass in a slutty way.

Takasugi stood in front of Hijikata, who sat cross-legged on a dark brown, leather couch. A cigarette hung out of his mouth as he went over notes and compiled recruitment papers from all the soon-to-be new recruits.

As the black haired male went over his papers, desperate Takasugi stood there, nearly smacking the shit out of the ignorant man.

_What the hell does Gintoki see in him?_

He peered closely at the face of Hijikata Toushirou, taking in the handsome, bad-boy, aloofness he seemed to emit. "Mm...I really don't see anything special," he murmured quietly to himself.

Cold, sharp, blue eyes snapped to him, glaring ferocity and killer intent. "You. Who the fuck're you, and why're you in here?"

"Ne, Yamazaki-saaaan brought me here, cause I wanted to talk to youuuu~," he replied flirtatiously, swiping a lock of fake blonde hair out of his face.

"Damn Yamazaki," Hijikata growled, uncross I g his legs and slamming the papers on a side table. "T'ch, what do ya need, woman?"

With an exquisite technique Takasugi had learned from Gintoki, he got on his knees, grabbing ahold of the supposed Mayora's calves. He looked up at him with a sweet gaze, and, without a word, threw his face into Hijikata's lower stomach and crotch.

He rubbed his face there for a few moments, nearly gagging at the thought of doing this to a shogunate dog. His head was shoved back and he scooted back a few feet, staring adorably at Hijikata.

"Did I do something wrong, Tosshi-kun?" He put his index finger on his lip cutely, batting his eyelashes at the now fuming male.

"What the fuck!? I don't know you, why would you do that?! And 'Tosshi-kun'?! Don't fuckin call me that, whore," Hijikata yelled, stood up, and stomped out of the room, leaving a grinning Takasugi in his wake.

_Infiltrate my way into the headquarters? Check. Meet Hijikata Toushirou? Check. Piss him off severely so that he'll leave me alone? Check & Mate._

* * *

Takasugi stood outside the door of the room, he'd recently learned, was where Katsura Kotarou was being kept. He straightened out his uniform, making sure that it didn't have any wrinkle in the stiff, but well-worn, fabric.

Earlier after he had snuck out of the room Hijikata had been occupying, he'd stowed away in the supply closet, where he found, conveniently, a wide array of different sized uniforms. After finding the perfect fit, he'd hidden his woman disguise, vowing not to come back for that nice little kimono even though he really wanted to keep it. He'd changed up his eyepatch for one with the Shinsengumi logo hand painted on it. He no longer wore the blond wig, and went instead with his natural hair, just with a different hairstyle.

With a uniform smile plastered on his face, Takasugi went to open the door to the room, sincerely hoping that neither Kondou nor Hijikata were present. As the door squeaked open, he came face-to-face with a distraught-looking Katsura.

"B-bastard! I'm done with these interrogations! You...you're never going to get any information out of me about my group or the Kiheitei," he stated angrily, his whole body shaking from either rage or fear, Takasugi couldn't quite tell.

The impersonator smirked and shut the door behind himself, then made his way to back Zura against the wall. The latter's chest rose and fell quickly, showing Takasugi that he was fearful of him. That only made his smirk turn into a sinister grin.

"Well, well, Zura. Seems you've gotten yourself into a sticky situation," he said wryly as multiple emotions flitted across Katsura's face, ranging from confusion to eagerness to anger to a deep sorrow.

"...damn it, I should've realized it was you, Takasugi, when you opened that door. Shit." Katsura pushed back against Takasugi's body, trying to get away, but to no avail.

Takasugi grabbed Zura's wrists and pinned them above his head, just like he had done to Gintoki, but this time he really did need to restrain the man.

"You gotta keep quiet for this to work out, Zura," he chided, using one hand to hold onto his wrists, and the other to get out a long rag. He tied the long haired male's wrists together, finally removing his hand from the uncomfortable position he had it in.

With a flick of his wrist, Takasugi had a ball gag in his hand. He put it on Katsura, smirking at the blush that spread across his cheeks.

_Ah, god. If both of us didn't belong to Gintoki, I'd totally take Zura as my own little bitch._

Grinning, Takasugi looked around, searching for any way they could escape. He noticed a small window that could fit both his and Katsura's bodies, but it would end up being a tight fit. Thankfully, Takasugi hadn't eaten anything that day or the day before, just in case, and it seemed that Zura was a bit food deprived.

He vowed that he'd feed the cute, long haired male food after he broke him out.

Knowing that he'd need a sword, he'd grabbed one earlier when he'd been in that supply closet. Pulling it from its sheath. Hopefully the sword could cut through the metal bars, and, it turned out, they could.

Without thinking, Takasugi grabbed Katsura and tossed him out the window, then followed after him quickly. He picked up the squirming ronin and ran, a gleeful grin on his face as the wind whipped by his hair.

_Let's just hope that they don't notice that he's gone until we reach the safe house. They won't know what him 'em._

* * *

Gintoki sat back on his couch, watching his rented porn intently. He was extremely bored, and he had been for the last two days.

After drinking with Hijikata, they had gone back to the barracks, heading straight for the raven-haired male's room, which ultimately led to a vulgar and raunchy make-out session. But, before Gintoki could even TRY to get into the other male's pants, they were interrupted by Sougo knocking and venting his anger at Kondou through the shoji, causing the Yorozuya to immediately lose his hard-on. Later after Okita had left, Gin decisively tried to start their foreplay up again, but it seemed that Hijikata had passed out. With a sigh and frustrated murmur, the perm head had decided just to leave.

The day after hadn't been too bad, he'd spent time with Hijikata after his work, leading up to another raunchy make-out session, although Gintoki had to leave early since he had plans. And the next two days sucked balls, since it seemed that the Mayora was avoiding him.

Sighing, he shut off the TV and rolled off the couch, hitting the floor with a _thump_. He stood up with a yawn, walking towards his own bedroom. He slid the shoji open, stumbled in, and collapsed on his futon.

Sleep took him in a way it hadn't in a long time; a deep slumber filled with erotic indecencies and then a horrific ending...

* * *

_"Gintoki...please..." The raven-haired male moaned as Gintoki bit his neck lightly, leaving a mark that would fade soon enough. They rolled their naked groins together, both gasping each time their erections brushed together._

_"..._**please**_ what?" Gin smirked at the scowl that crossed the older male's face, and he leaned in to kiss him lightly. Blue eyes connected with red ones as the Mayora opened his mouth willingly._

_Gin pushed his tongue in, coaxing a sweet moan out of his partner. Their tongues touched, Gintoki's being the more dominant organ at the moment, though, hopefully, the shy Hijikata would decide to be the dominant lover when the time came._

_Reaching down, Gintoki gripped the hardened arousal that was little Hijikata, stroking it lovingly. His thumb teased the tip, spreading the beading pre-cum into the head._

_He smirked knowingly when the Mayora bit into his shoulder. Hijikata licked at the wound in apology, an adorable pinkish blush spreading across his cheeks. _

_"S-sorry..." He murmured quietly, burying his face into Gintoki's shoulder as he stroked the Mayora's weeping cock._

_As he continuously changed rhythms on his stroking, Gintoki used his other hand to move down Hijikata's back, over the supple curve of his ass, and to the puckered entrance that he couldn't wait to pound into._

_With a grin, he moved his hand back up and to Hijikata's mouth. _

_"Suck." The Mayora looked from Gin to his fingers and back again. He then complied, taking three of them into his mouth, his tongue stroking over the pads of his fingers._

_Once Gintoki was sure that they were wet enough, he pulled them out of his Oogushi-kun's mouth with a _**pop**_, and moved them back down to the older male's ass._

_He teased Hijikata's entrance, one finger eagerly pushing against the tight ring of muscles. "Ne, Oogushi-kun, you need to relax, or else this might end up hurting..."_

_He pushed his index finger in slowly as the muscles ever-so-slowly relaxed, allowing the foreign appendage in. Thrusting the finger shallowly in and out, Gintoki finally pushed it in up to his knuckle. He slowly slid the second finger in, pausing when he heard a short, pained gasp come from Hijikata._

_"Are you okay, Oogushi-kun?"_

_"Fuck no, bastard. I'm being touched by a _**filthy**_, _**disgusting**_ dick head like you. I'm not fucking okay. I hate this; I hate _**you**_!"_

* * *

Gintoki awoke quickly with short, sharp breaths, his heart panting with hurt and pain. His body was sweat slicked, and when he looked down he could see his erection pressing against his black pants.

Groaning, he rolled over, not wanting to get up to relive himself of his annoying hardness. But, deciding he was very uncomfortable in his everyday clothes, he got up and padded to his bathroom, jumping in the shower.

He turned on cold water, allowing it to spray over his to cool him down and rid him of his erection. Once it was gone, he started to wash up; starting with his hair and ending with the bottoms of his feet. Hey, he didn't want his feet to smell odd when he woke up.

He shut off the water and climbed out, running a hand through his wet, slicked down hair. He toweled dry, brushed his teeth, and clambered back into his bedroom, a wet towel barely clinging to his hips.

He moved to his closet, opening it and grabbing his nice, teal pajamas. He put them with ease, and moved to his futon, lying down to stare up at the ceiling of his bedroom. As he lay there, he decided not to ponder over the feelings he had for his dream.

With a grumble, he rested his arm over his eyes, and fell into a deep sleep that didn't lead to any dreams.

What he didn't realize was, tears were streaming down his face as he slept, soft sobs escaping him.

* * *

Katsura glared defiantly at Takasugi as he sat in front of him, sipping on a box of sour lemonade. He didn't quite understand _why_ his old comrade had rescued him from the Shinsengumi, but he guessed the man wanted something from him.

"So, Takasugi, what do you want from me?" Katsura questioned, his eyes carefully lowered.

"Hm? What do I want from you? I don't want anything. Well, not anything that you won't mind giving me," he replied, grinning wryly.

Zura stiffened. "Not anything I won't mind giving you? What do you mean by that?" He scratched his neck awkwardly.

"Mm...what I mean is, want to help me separate Gintoki and that demon Hijikata?" Takasugi clapped his hands together cheerily, which was really out of character for him.

"Wait...separate them? How close have they gotten while I was in that cell?" He asked, his heart thumping wildly in fear. Oh god, what if they've had sex? What if they were official lovers?

Takasugi stared at his nails as he stretched his arms and hand out. "Mm...pretty close. I'm not sure if they've fucked yet or not, but feelings are starting to develop, if you know what I mean. Well, I haven't seen them in three days, although when I did see them, they were nearly eye fuckin each other."

"W-what!? Feelings? _**Developing**_? But..but...Gintoki _never_ gets attached to his flings!" Katsura was so close to breaking down and crying. Why was this happening? Whywhywhywhywhywhy?

"Tsk, as if I don't know that. I was one of his earlier flings, remember? If I'm correct, I was his first man, and even back then he never developed feelings for me," Takasugi deadpanned, and graciously smoothened his hair out back to its original style. He started to remove the eyepatch, but quickly decided against it when he realized he didn't have any bandages.

Zura visibly flinched at those words and nodded. "Yeah...I know...but it still doesn't make any sense that he's now getting attached to someone. And a fuckin shogunate dog too!"

"It's sad, and true, but we can separate them. I just need your help, Zura," Takasugi stated with a grimace, " I don't enjoy his relationship with the demon Hijikata just as much as you, so why don't we work together to remove them from each other's lives. Are you with me?"

Takasugi stuck out his hand, raising his brow at Katsura.

Zura thought for a moment, nodded, and grabbed ahold of the outstretched hand. "Mhm, I'm with ya."

And they shook on it, vowing to get between the two males, no matter what the cost.

* * *

Gintoki woke up to stomping and yelling. He leaned up on his elbow, wiping his eyes with his other hand.

He stood up slowly, stretching out the kinks in his back as he did. He yawned and padded to his door, opening it and stepping out of his bedroom. What he saw didn't exactly surprise him, but it still sent small pangs of shock across his skin. It was akin to normal, and that's what made shock course through him.

There stood Kagura standing on top of the coffee table with a large light bulb in her hand. Sadaharu stood by, and so did Shinpachi, who seemed to be trying to coax her to allow him to do it.

Why were they stomping wound if they were just going to change a damn bulb!?

He strode into the room, arms crossed as he watched. Once the bulb was changed, Kagura hopped down from the table and laughed happily.

She then noticed him and yelled, "Gin-chaaaaan! Why were you sleeping in the middle of the day?!"

He shrugged and scratched the back of his head. "Mm...I'm not so sure, Kagura. Just tired, I guess. Or bored. I'm not sure. Do we have any strawberry milk left?"

Shinpachi sighed, nodding slowly. "Yeah, not much though. I'll be going shopping with Kagura-chan and Sadaharu soon, so I'll buy you some more."

"Mm..good." Gintoki made his way to the kitchen, opened the fridge, and snatched his more than half empty carton of strawberry milk. He removed the cap and lifted the carton up, in his mouth, and chugged the rest down.

"Ne...Gin-chaaaan!"

Gintoki looked over at Kagura, eyebrows raised. "Hm? What?"

"Why're you still in your pjs?"

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, which was sticking up in random permy messiness. "I'm not going anywhere for the rest of today, as I didn't and don't have plans anyways." He grumbled incoherently at his fingers came upon tangles.

"Oh," was all she said, and then turned her attention to petting Sadaharu roughly, who in turn yipped in annoyance and cheerfulness, however those two emotions mixed.

Shinpachi pushed his glasses up and sat on with couch with a huff, and Gin noted that he seemed peeved about..._something_, that he couldn't place. With a cocky grin, he tossed the empty carton of pink milk into the garbage, striding leisurely over to otaku-megane.

He plopped down next to the Shimura male, placing his arm over the sixteen year old's shoulder. "Ne, Shinpachi, what's the matter? Hm? Hmmmmm?"

"...nothing is wrong, Gin-san," he replied harshly, his eyes dark and filled with something Gintoki didn't recognize as the usual Shinpachi emotions.

"Women problems?" He cleaned his ear with his pinkie, feeling the younger male tense up. "Am I correct?"

Not answering, Shinpachi removed himself from contact with the older male, and moved off of the couch, eye lowered. Not looking at Gintoki, he yelled, "Kaaaaaguraaaaa-chaaaan, Saaaadaaaahaaaruuuu, time to go shoppiiiiingggg!"

It turned out that both of them had left the room and were currently in Gin's bedroom. They then bounded into the room, both wiggling around excitedly.

"Okaaaay, bye bye, Gin-chaaaan," Kagura replied, hurrying out of the apartment, followed by both Shinpachi and Sadaharu.

"See ya, Gin-san," Shinpachi said as he drew shut the sliding door behind them, leaving Gintoki alone to his thoughts.

Shifting uncomfortably on the couch, the lonely perm-head decided to think about porn, instead of the meaning of his dream from earlier. He shut his eyes and dozed off, not fully falling out of consciousness, but also not fully awake.

* * *

Hours later, there was a distinct, loud, and obnoxious knocking somewhere. Gintoki's eyes cracked open and he groaned loudly as his muscles creaked and his bones cracked at the movement.

The knocking sounded again, and this time he could place where it was coming from. He stood up from the couch and lazily headed for the front sliding door. He slid it open, only to find himself at sword point and bazooka point.

"E-eh?" He waved his hands back and forth in front of him. "Oogushi-kun, Souichiro-kun, w-what're you doing here?"

"T'ch, it's Sougo, Danna," Okita muttered at the same time Hijikata started yelling, "Damn it, Gintoki! What did you **_do_** with Katsura Kotarou! We _**know**_ he's here!"

"Ara? Zura's gone?" He replied dumbly, scratching the back of his head as he slowly stepped away from the bazooka and sharp sword pointed at him.

Hijikata glared, but sheathed his sword. "Oh yeah. He's gone. And, well, we figured he'd be here."

Sougo nodded quickly, although he didn't put away his bazooka. Instead, it seemed that he was ready to fire it. "Where're ya hiding him, Danna? We know you guys have...a physical relationship, so it's completely natural for him to come here."

Gintoki blinked and backed up a bit more. "I'm sorry, but I don't have any idea where he is."

Both the Shinsengumi officers narrowed their eyes at him, evaluating him. "You better not be lying, or else we can arrest you for helping a known criminal," Hijikata stated harshly.

"As I said before, I don't fucking know _where_ he is, damn it!" Gin huffed, crossing his arms in front of him, which made his muscles more defined under his pajamas.

Okita then quickly spoke up, "Then where is he?"

* * *

Across Edo, Katsura sneezed multiple times.

"Mm...people must be talking about me..."

* * *

**_A/N_**: **lalala. replying to reviews now! ^^**

_Life Starts Forever_: ehe, I loved the ending of the previous chapter, cause it cave me some plot bunnies for this one! I'm glad you enjoyed! I sincerely hope you liked this one! ^^

Sankyuu for your reviews, and until next time!

*waves* ^^

_Karunebulous_: Oh haaai! ^^

Yup, I love cat 'n mouse, but sadly in this current chapter, Gin-chan is reaaalllyyyy OOC, but pft. There's mild GinHiji action, at least. Well, dream! GinHiji action that end in nothing but despair for poor Gin-chan. OnO

Sakamoto miiiiight be part of the long list, but who knows? Probably, knowing myself. Pft XD

Oh god, plot bunnies everywhere! Sankyuu! I received your review when I was typing out this current chapter, so thank youuuu! n.n although, not much salt in the wounds just yet, ahaha. Soon though. Very soon. XD

Zura is probably my favorite character to write at the moment, along with Takasugi, cause, well, he's just fun to play around with and mold him the way I want. ^^

The harem is definitely fun to write about, and they'll be recurring soon enough :3

Plot bunnies!

I got off topic during this reply, didn't I? I know I did. I apologize for that, I'm easily distracted XD

Thanks for your review! Means so much! And providing plot bunnies! :D

Until next time!

*bows and then waves* OuO


	10. Chapter 9

_**A/N**_: _Yo! I'm sincerely sorry for this rather slow (and short) update! I've just been super busy and shit– school, friends, reading, etc._

**Gotta say, this chapter is just utter crap. So, I'll hurry up and quit blabbering so that you guys can read in peace.**

_Spelling & Grammatical errors are all mine._

**PS: Sorry if nothing is coherent. Ask questions, if ya want. Also, I just realized that this is a bit AUish. Whoopsie. XD**

_Enjoy_

* * *

-**Chapter Nine**-

* * *

Tsukuyo sucked on her _kiseru_, shutting her eyes as she did so. Once the nicotine flooded her system, she blew the smoke out in little gray circles.

She allowed herself a weary sigh as she gazed up at the dark night sky. She stepped carefully, as she must do to be safe and secure when she was reluctantly in her own thoughts. She easily reached the place she'd been heading towards, a small, sad smile gracing her lips.

**_Otose's Snack House_**

Her smile faltered when she saw that Gintoki's bedroom light illuminated the surrounding area outside of his relatively small window. She peered, from afar, into the window.

Shock went through her at the sight she saw.

She saw two figures, both male. One, she knew most definitely, was Gintoki, but the other, she wasn't sure. She hit her bottom lip as tears threatened to fall from her eyes.

What she saw pained her deeply. It was the sight of two men embracing passionately. As if love was the only thing on their minds, and nothing in the world could cause them harm or pain...

* * *

Katsura sat next to Takasugi, their hands clasped tightly together. They watched– well, _leered_– at the figure of their love interest.

Zura had his hand tied up in a high ponytail, pink and flamboyant sunglasses donning the tip of his nose as he peered over them. His outfit was much more uncomfortable than his usual, well-worn yukata. The outfit consisted of a pair of tight green skinny jeans, which showed off his nice ass, and his top was a purple shirt consisting of lace and frills every-which-way, pissing him off as he wore it.

The reason why he was dressed in such ridiculous attire? Well, to not get noticed by Gintoki, or any Shogunate Dogs for that matter, was to dress in the most comical way, so that the attention they attracted was just weird looks, not suspicious ones.

He turned his attention from his lover boy to Takasugi Shinsuke, whom had donned a similar fashion style, except his sunglasses were bright yellow, his jeans were crimson red, and his blue top was something along the lines of a woman's tank top.

He nodded inwardly his approval at the sight. To be absolutely truthful, Takasugi wasn't horrible to look at, he was actually relatively sexy and handsome, in a crazy/psycho/sadist kind of way. He had to admit, if he'd never fallen for Gintoki, Katsura would have most definitely gone after Shinsuke, even if the guy was slightly irritating and almost always calling him his most hated name, '_Zura_'.

With an unnoticeable shudder, he went back to spying on the damn sexy perm head. He shifted his position, nearly removing his hand from Takasugi, and winced when his palm was squeezed hard enough to nearly snap his bones.

He noted that Gin seemed distracted; more distracted than Katsura had ever seen him. He raised his eyebrows at the sight when the permy bastard shook his head, probably rejecting the offer of a fuck date.

Well, he sincerely hoped that he was rejecting something along those lines, mainly because Zura didn't enjoy sharing his Gintoki with anyone, even one-night flings. Even though he would never openly admit this to anyone, let alone the Yorozuya, he was quite possessive whenever he ended up in a relationship. Jealousy always seemed to come into play. Maybe that was why he'd ended up in just a fuck-buddy type of relationship with him. Also, he liked the sex too much.

Yeah, Gintoki was _**that**_ good. The damned Yorozuya made Katsura CRAVE his touches; crave the feeling of having that deliciously sized dick shoved so far up his ass that when Gin came, he could almost feel the pulsing of that cock in his throat.

Gulping noticeably, Katsura felt himself go hard at the thought. He quickly crossed his legs, so that the bulge in his jeans wouldn't be noticeable. He noted that skinny jeans definitely were _not_ the thing for guys to wear when they went to a strip club, or any place that'd make a man get an erection in the blink of an eye.

People milled about, different arrays of clothing and styles about. There was a probable reason to _why_ everyone about was dressed either too fanciful or too sloppily. Thankfully, Takasugi had been the one to choose their outfits, or else they'd probably both be crossdreesing, although Zura didn't mind in the least.

A bored expression plastered on Takasugi's face, he turned to Katsura. "Zura, I'm bored. Let's just get going, we won't see anything useful yet, ya know? He probably already knows we're stalking him."

"Eh? But...but Gintoki...he's...up to something...I just know it! Something that'll really piss that bastard Hijikata off!"

Groaning in exasperation, Takasugi patted the top of Katsura's head. "Mm, if you really say so. But it IS the first day. Who knows how long we'll be watching him; maybe soon enough we'll see something to case their 'relationship' to collapse in on itself, hm?"

"True..."

"Good Zura. Now, let's get outta here. I have the feeling those Shogunate dogs are also watching Gintoki..."

They left, hand in hand.

* * *

With a defining crackle and pop, Gintoki stretched out his back from his nap. He felt thoruroughy drowsy and tired as hell– all naps made him that way.

He scratched the back of his neck, and then the top of his head. He felt tingly, as if he was being watched. Maybe it was just his nerves. Highly unlikely, since the Shinsengumi were watching over him, in case he came into contact with Zura.

He considered their watchful gazes and hushed whispers complete and utter bullshit, but he would have to deal with them for the time being. At least until they wither caught Zura, or got bored with him and found him useless.

Groaning, he barely took a step from the couch, only to hear someone knocking, rather loudly, on the door. He shuffled over, sliding the shoji open with a slam.

"Oi, let me in, bastard."

"Ooh, Oogushi-kun~, what a pleasure!" He moved out of the way as Hijikata stormed into his home. He blinked rapidly at the angered appearance of the raven-haired male.

"T'ch, it's not exactly a pleasure, bastard."

Gintoki raised his brows, and questioned, "How so?"

"You fuckin know why it's not a goddamn pleasure! You sick fuck! I now understand _why_ you've been after me this whole damn time!" Hijikata snarled, his face set deep in rage.

"Ne, Oogushi-kun, since when have I been after you? I don't remember ever trying to court and/or fuck you."

"Sonofabitch, what about this past week!? What was up with you trying to fuck me while I was drunk, huh, _**huh**_?!"

Gintoki smirked. "Ah, _that's_ what you meant. You only asked me to, and I never defy another man's wishes when it come to sexual activities."

"Slut."

"I know I am, so your point _is_?" The angry cloud that was surrounding Hijikata slowly dispersed, leaving behind a confused, and upset, looking vice commander.

Hijikata scoffed, turning his head to the side, making a point to look offended. "So, those few nights where I was intoxicated, they meant absolutely _nothing_ to you?!"

"Of course they meant something, Oogushi-kun. I've wanted you for a while, but now I have the chance to finally take you," Gintoki stated, his stomach fluttering slightly.

In all actual truthfulness, he would never (under any circumstances) say something mushy and romantic to someone he wanted to bed. A few sweet words here and there, and it was so easy to drag them in and fuck them senseless. But, for some unknown reason, he felt the need to speak his mind, to speak his feelings, to this demonic man.

Under a vague sense of calm, Gintoki continued on, "You know...I might actually feel something for you akin to lo–"

He was immediately cut off when Kondou and Sougo stormed into his home, their faces wild and hair in disarray.

Kondou spoke first, his voice loud and booming. "Gintoki, Toshi, we might have a lead on where Katsura Kotarou and the man who took him might be!"

Gin froze, his eyes wide with shock.

_They found Zura? MY Zura? Shit._

He didn't exactly _want_ his fuck buddy to get caught and thrown back in jail. He certainly missed their sex; it was usually fantastic, unless one of them wasn't in the mood, then the other had to get the party-pooper in the mood. Which, sometimes, could be unbearably hard, especially when the pissy one was Katsura.

He turned his attention from his thoughts to the sight of Hijikata deep in thought also, his eyebrows furrowed as his mind shuffled through every bit of information he received. He then looked straight in Kondou's eyes.

"Lead the way, Kondou-san."

They left Gintoki's home, causing the poor perm head to choose between following or staying put. Either way, he'd have to deal with some type of repercussion. So, he chose the former, following the three Shinsengumi officers decisively.

* * *

_**TAP.**_

_**SIGH.**_

_**TAP. TAP.**_

_**SNORT.**_

_**TAP. TAP. TAP.**_

_**COUGH.**_

_**TAP. TAP. TAP. TAP.**_

_**BANG.**_

"Fuckin quit it, you bitches!" An exasperated Shimura Tae bellowed.

A quirk of lips from Sacchan, a scoff from Otose, a frown from Kyuubei, and finally a solemn blowing of smoke circles from Tsukuyo.

"All right, then. Now, let's get on to our business. Any more information on the man that Gintoki is trying to date, fuck, love, whatever?" She questioned, her brown eyes nearly expressionless, except for the tiny sliver of fear.

Three heads shook, but one nodded. "Okay, Otose-san, speak."

"T'ch, you shouldn't be telling me what to do, brat," Otose snarled. She then took a long drag from her cigarette, and continued. "Well, it seems that the young Hijikata-san has been spending much more time with Gintoki since the first day he arrived at my snack house."

"And how long ago was that?"

Otose tapped her chin lightly as she thought. "Mm...about a week ago. Maybe even less than that, but the demon vice commander has been around more often, along with that gorilla Kondou-san and sadist Okita-san."

Two women scoffed, one being Otae, the other being Sacchan.

They replied in harmony, "We already knew this!"

The older woman glared at the two, her perfectly manicured eyebrows raising up. "I'm not finished, brats." She sighed and fixed her yukata. "As I was saying, it seems that something has happened with a current sex friend of Gintoki, Kotarou."

All the other women in the room stared at her in confusion. "Kotarou?"

"Ah, yes, you might know him as Zura, since Gintoki has always seemed to speak of him as such," she informed them, a smirk playing on her lips.

All women went 'ooooohhhhh', then nodded as if they understood. They probably didn't. Otose didn't really give a shit one way or another. She just wanted to get the story on the road.

So, she did. "So, Ko– ZURA, it seems, had been recently broken out of the Shinsengumi headquarters by an unknown. And it is highly possible for Zura to start something once again with Gintoki. Any suggestions on how to keep Gintoki away from both of those raven-haired men?"

Tsukuyo raised her hand up. "I have an idea, sort of."

"Continue..."

All eyes were on the blonde.

She smirked, her scar suddenly seeming sinister.

* * *

Hijikata squawked when he was pounced upon by the big, fluffy, fur-ball of an Inugami. He growled inwardly as a big wet tongue licked up the side of his face, his eyes set into a glare.

He had the biggest of urges to just shove the goddamn dog off of him, although he held back, since that one young girl, Kagura, was angrily chatting away with Sougo. He _really_ did not want to piss her off, since he would most likely feel her Yato wrath in areas that he didn't want hit, punched, or pounded to oblivion. Aka, his dick.

He frowned when his thoughts trailed off to what Gintoki was saying earlier, but was quickly distracted when a powerful jaw engulfed his head. He stared blankly around at the wet interior of a huge ass mouth.

He grunted, and made sure not to move, in case the damn Inugami decided to chomp down on his head and end Hijikata's ridiculously cigarette-prived life.

He heard a snort, and then the vaguely annoying voice of Kagura. The jowls of the huge dog opened up, allowing Hijikata to fall to the ground with his hair wet with slobber and his whole body ungarcefully shaking from rage.

A hand clasped his forearm. He looked to the side and down, staring face-to-face with a grinning Sougo.

"Oi, don't look at me that way, bastard sadist," he said menacingly, or as menacingly as he could with his hair a complete rat's nest.

Okita just grinned. "Ne, Hijikata-saaaaan. How was the doggie's mouth? Enjoy it much?"

Hijikata scoffed angrily. "As fucking if. It was disgusting."

"Everything seems to be 'disgusting' to you, Oogushi-kun," Gintoki input, his body showing how lazy he was just by standing there.

_Sonofabitch._

"I—"

* * *

_The moon shone softly, casting glimmering light through the curtain-less window. A vague sound echoed throughout the room, the throbbing noise bouncing off of everything, except the two motionless figures curled up on the bed in the direct center of the room._

_One of the unconscious figures groaned aloud, and then snuggled in closer to the second, face nuzzling into the neck of the latter._

_A defining screech resounded throughout the room as the wooden shoji was slammed open, a deformed, angry male glaring at the slowly awakening, and sleepy, gazes of the two figures._

_Goddamnit, —! — is mine!" The much older male nearly screeched, his long blond hair falling into his face._

_Silvery locks fell into a sleepy and doe-eyed face, childish red eyes staring at the fuming male. "Sensei, I–"_

_"I don't give a bloody shit about what you're about to say! He," _**sensei**_ pointed at the other figure in the bed, "was MINE! Tonight was supposed to be _**our**_ night, damnit! And you fucking ruined it, you god forsaken _**slut**_. _**Disgusting**_!"_

_The silver-haired male bowed his head, tears pricking at the corners of his eyes._

**I will not cry. I will not cry. I will not– **

_Tears streamed down his face. "I-it wasn't my fault, sens–"_

_"Shut your whore mouth, —! You, —, you're coming with me. NOW."_

_And so the other figure got out of the bed, dressed, and left, not giving the teary-eyed male a second glance..._

* * *

_A/N:__** Yup yup, here we are once again! :) Review replies! ^^**_

_Life Starts Forever_: Hey! I'm very sorry for taking so long to update! And I'm glad you enjoyed! Your reviews mean so much, they give me a shit-eating grin, haha! :) Until next time! ^^

_Karunebulous_: Ohayou! :)

I really fucking loved playing around with Takasugi as a woman; hey, maybe he'll get to be one again sometime soon. Although, for this current chapter, I didn't give him much screen time. I gotta say though, he'll be a minor antagonist, and you might be able to guess who the primary antagonist shall be. If not, well, (s)he'll make another appearance soon enough! :D

Also, I'm not totally sure if I actually want Takasugi to be Gin-chan's first male. Maybe first actual 'true' fuck? Ahaha, this is sorta turning AUish, I've noticed. XD Whoops.

Oh, and the harem, sure as hell have plans for them! Well, primarily just one of them, although she'll receive help along the way. *hint hint* it's Tsukuyo :P

Shinpachi won't be set as a lover for Gin-chan, his feathers have just been ruffled by a certain orange-haired fourteen year old. XD

Sougo and Kondou's 'relationship'(should I call it that?) will come more into play soon! :3

And yes, I find plot bunnies quite easily, so even if you don't mean to leave them, I somehow find 'em! XD

Until next time! :3

_Yuukilover_: Thank you so much for reviewing! I'm glad you liked it! :) I hope you enjoyed this current chapter! ^^


	11. Chapter 10

**_A/N_**: **And here we go! Another (late) update! :D Still short as fuuuck, but I tried to make it at least a little bit interesting...o.o**

_I have a question: Does anybody want a sexy male/female past-lover of Hijikata to come in and spice things up a bit? Too unoriginal? Probably._

**I apologize in advance for shitty mistakes.**

_Enjoy! _

* * *

-**Chapter Ten**-

* * *

Hijikata slammed his fist, hard, against wall right next to the shoji that led to his bedroom in the Shinsengumi barracks. Figuratively speaking, he wasn't exactly mad; he was more embarrassed and disgusted with himself, not that he wasn't angry in some way. It just wasn't the rage he was expecting with his explanation to Gintoki.

Designating a sigh to thin air, he slid open the shoji and hurriedly entered his room, slamming it closed behind himself. He leaned leisurely against the wall, slowly allowing himself to slide down so that his ass hit the floor with a muted thump.

He reached into his uniform, scrabbling around with his fingers as he searched for his most pleasurable addiction. Aha! Found them!

He pulled out the nearly empty pack of cigarettes, a soft smile gracing his lips. Once again, he reached into his uniform, quickly finding his lighter.

Removing a cancer stick from its resting place, he swiftly stuck it in his mouth, lighting it up with casual elegance. He took in a deep drag, blew the smoke out, and allowed his mind to wander back to his and Gintoki's earlier conversation.

—**FLASHBACK**—

_Hijikata scoffed angrily. "As fucking if. It was disgusting."_

_"Everything seems to be 'disgusting' to you, Oogushi-kun," Gintoki input, his body showing how lazy he was just by standing there._

_Sonofabitch._

_"I—"_

_Hijikata paused, no exactly sure where to go with his words. He wanted to explain to Gin that whenever he said DISGUSTING, he didn't actually mean it was disgusting! Ugh, his words were so fucking hypocritical, and he knew it._

_He scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, shuffling from side to side as he mulled over his words carefully. How could he elucidate what he truly meant when he said 'disgusting'?_

_It wasn't the nicest word in the book; he knew that for sure. He'd been called disgusting a couple of times, but it had always been when he was scarfing down mayonnaise-covered-something-or-another, or even when he'd been chain-smoking when he had been stressed._

_But, when he said that word, it had been filled with such...such abhorrence and contempt. In all truthfulness, he never felt such a thing when he was around Gintoki. _

_Okay, scratch that. He felt something along the 'disgusted' lines whenever the Yorozuya was around his 'harem' or with his one-time lovers or with that fucking Katsura Koutarou. _

_Eh, let's just forget about those times._

_He hummed thoughtfully, his thoughts spinning 'round and 'round inside of his head. He heard an annoyed cough._

_He blinked, bringing his attention back to Gintoki._

_Hijikata started again. "I-I've NEVER felt disgusted with you. Disgusting...disgusting is just a word I say when I'm not comfortable...with things happening around me..."_

_Well, that explanation was shit._

_Gintoki seemed to ponder his words for only a couple of seconds, and then he laughed. His laughter chilled Hijikata deeply._

_It wasn't the happy type of laughter. It wasn't even the psychotic kind. It was the saddest type of laughter Hijikata had ever heard, and it nearly broke his heart just from hearing it._

—**FLASHBACK END**—

Hijikata ground his teeth together, causing the filter of his cigarette to get crushed up along with it. Uh, no. He removed the cancer stick from his mouth, and, with a smooth motion, put the cherry out, tossing the not-fully-smoked cigarette to the side.

He needed another one. Either that, or mayonnaise. And, since he was _supposed_ to be getting a goodnight's sleep, unless he wanted Kondou to murder him for not getting one, he opted out for going on a mayo run.

Vaguely, he pondered over the brief looks here and there that were thrown by Kondou and Okita. It was as if they were hiding something; something intriguing, but also sinister.

Huh. Maybe Sougo finally got the courage to pounce and fuck Kondou's brains out. It was very likely, even if Hijikata thought that Kondou was still too hung up on Otae and, maybe even, Gintoki. Hopefully not on the latter.

Wait. No. Kondou hadn't been walking with a limp at all the whole time Hijikata had been around, and neither had Okita, although he figured that the latter would never allow another man to fuck him. He had too big of an ego to be the woman in any kind of relationship.

He wasn't even sure **_why_** he was thinking about his boss and kouhai's relationship. He guessed it was because he didn't want to think over his own feelings for a certain perm-haired idiot.

With slow movements, Hijikata made himself lie on his stomach. Then, he started to scoot across the floor, almost like a worm, making his way slowly to his comfortable looking futon.

Once he reached said futon, he sat up, scooted his tush onto the bedding, and then resigned himself into lying back on it. He didn't bother with the covers; he never did. For reasons unknown, he sweated at night while he slept, so he never covered himself during his late hours of sleep.

Shutting his eyes, he drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

The next day was rough.

Hijikata had to deal with the whole Yorozuya crew, along with Kondou, Sougo, Yamazaki, and Otae. For some odd reason, the older Shimura had wanted to tag along when they headed out to investigate, and, (of course) Kondou allowed it.

It was as if she was spying on them. He surely hoped that wasn't the answer. He really did not want to piss his boss off if he ended up having to arrest the gorilla-like woman.

Opinionatedly speaking, he wasn't too happy about the female tagging along. She always seemed to stick to Gintoki like glue, and she usually ended up kicking the shit out of Kondou– that did not make Okita any more cheerful, it just pissed him off. And Kondou, he was such a dumb shit for never noticing the loving eyes that came from his younger subordinate.

The mayora sucked in a deep breath, smoke and nicotine flooding his system in a rush. Removing the lit cigarette from his mouth, he stared at the creepy, and empty, building in front of his group and himself.

Earlier, he'd been paired up with Gintoki, Otae, and Yamazaki as the first group, while the second group was made up of Kondou, Sougo, Shinpachi, and Kagura. Clearly, it seemed, Kami had a sense of humor.

He found Gintoki annoying for apparent reasons, his opinion on Otae wasn't the best, and Yamazaki was just his pack mule, so he had no feelings for the plain-looking man.

He had the urge to distance himself from his group, but if he did that, he figured (since the house was creepy) he would get freaked out easily, and so would Gintoki. And he'd just love to see the Yorozuya get scared.

He dropped the cigarette butt the the ground, and then stepped on it with his foot, grinding it into the pavement. "Let's just get this search over with," he said, his fingers twitching towards his sword.

With those words, Hijikata and his group entered the abandoned building.

* * *

Okita Sougo was annoyed. Annoyed with the Yorozuya kids and his boss (current receiver of his affections).

They stood before an archway that led to an abandoned hospital. Why Katsura and whoever broke him out would come here, Okita sure as hell didn't know. Kondou could be such a dumbass when it came to searching for people.

Sougo had no idea what he saw in the man, but, for some odd reason, he got butterflies in his belly whenever the man randomly glomped him or came to receive help when he was getting bashed int the floor by that bitch Otae.

Ugh, he _really_ needed to get laid. Maybe that was why he was so hung up on the much older man. When they finished with their investigation for the day, Okita vowed that he'd go out to a bar and find an ass to fuck, be it man or woman. Hey, it could be just the idea of fucking another man was what had him going for the moment.

Yup. Good idea. Finish searching, go to bar, pick up a guy, fuck him senseless, and **BAM**, his interest in Kondou would be gone.

Okita smiled to himself. Ahhhh, he couldn't wait.

So, he turned to the youngsters and his boss. "Let's hurry the fuck up now. I got plans, and I don't need sorry ass kids around me when I get those plans done."

"I'm not a kid!" Squawked Kondou in despair, along with Kagura shouting how she didn't want to be linked with the 'megane-kun' and 'gorilla bastard'.

"Kondou-San, you sure as hell ACT like a child, so I'm going to call you one. Now come on! I really need to get this shit done and over with."

They all nodded solemnly, and followed Sougo into the hospital.

* * *

Katsura stood on a high building, his eyes staring off into space. Well, not exactly space. He was secretly watching Gintoki and his relatively small group enter his and Takasugi's previous hideout.

Heh, dumbasses. Didn't the bastards realize that if either him or Shinsuke discovered that they would search their own hiding place, they'd immediately leave?

Both of the two ronin had connections; eyes that could watch from just about anywhere. Neither of them were stupid, but, since the Shinsengumi thought of them as such, almost everybody did.

Under the facade of Katsura's stupidity his a battle-ready killer. It was the same with Gintoki and Sakamoto, while Takasugi was well-known to be cunning and ruthless.

Ha! They didn't know the fucking half of it.

His eyebrow twitched slightly when Gintoki turned and stared right at him, a feral grin nearly splitting his face in two.

_Ahhhhh, shiiiit. Gintoki spotted meeeeee. Daaaammmnnnn._

And with those thoughts running through his mind, Katsura hurriedly strode from the top of the building, heading for their new hiding place. Helpfully, the bastard Shinsengumi didn't find the new spot.

* * *

Dumbass knowledge dictated that the empty building was haunted, Gintoki rationalized to himself. He trailed quietly behind Yamazaki and Otae, who were keeping up a pleasant conversation. But, Hijikata was walking step-by-step with the Yorozuya, and it was slowly getting on his nerves.

Yeah, he was scared shitless too, but did Hijikata actually HAVE to walk right next to him!? Didn't he realize that Gintoki was after his ass?! Or was he just being plain stupid?

It was most likely the latter.

Gin trudged along, his permy hair falling into his face on multiple occasions, causing him to huff and puff as he fixed his curly hair. Once he figured that his hair was at least a bit manageable, he started to fiddle with his hands in nervousness.

"...rm-head...Perm-head!"

He got smacked on the head

"Ara!? What the fuck, Oogushi-kun!?" He bellowed as he glared daggers at the mayora.

"T'ch, I've been trying to get your attention for quite some time now, bastard. You could at least pay attention when we're searching for _**your**_ missing lover, ya know!"

"He's not my fucking lover, okay!? We fuck, that's _**it**_!"

"I don't even gives a shit, perm-head. Just pay attention next time I'm talking to you."

"Psh, as-fucking-if. I don't give a shit about what you say, unless it's something about me getting laid, and _then_ I'll actually pay a teeny bit of attention to ya, Oogushi-kun."

Before he knew what was happening, Gintoki fell to his knees, his hands moving about to cover his crotch. He let out a pained groan as he just about felt the life being sucked out of his body.

_Oh god, the pain! Shitshitshitshit..._

"It fucking hurts! What the hell, Hijikata!?"

He missed the slight wince that came from said man, and only heard the click of a lighter and then the smell of cigarette smoke.

"Bastard. Don't talk about your sex life around me. It's annoying and dis–...annoying. Just annoying." With those words, Hijikata trudged off, following behind the now faraway Tae and Yamazaki.

Gintoki just groaned and tried to stand, which he somehow succeeded. He carefully stepped after his group, trailing far behind them.

_Shit. It hurts. Who knew Oogushi-kun could pack such a kick to my balls..? Shit...fuck..._

* * *

Sougo grinned maliciously as he followed behind Kondou (the Yorozuya kids were right behind him, chattering quietly to themselves). He leered at that delicious ass, nearly groaning as those tight pants stretched taut around it.

_Ahhhh, so perfect._

He had the urge to reach out and just touch it, but he held himself back. If he did that, then Kondou would know about Sougo's sort of like/love feelings for the man. And Okita most definitely did NOT want that.

He clenched his hands into fists, his urges becoming harder and harder to control.

Like his dick.

Shit, that was a horrible mental joke. Although, he laughed inwardly at himself.

He turned back to yell at the two Yorozuya kids, only to find the red-headed one, Kagura, seriously **_too_** close to his face.

He backed up quickly, nearly falling over himself as he did. "Oioioioi! What are you doing, kid!?"

Kagura glared and stuck out her tongue, while her cheeks were tinged a light shade of pink. Her blue eyes were blazing with something Sougo recognized easily.

_Ooh. She likes me, eh? Haha, this could be fun. _

His gaze lingered for a moment, and then his eyes moved to the other Yorozuya brat, Shinpachi, who was glaring angrily at him.

_Aw, crap. That brat likes the pipsqueak. I shouldn't do anything, should I?_

Quickly, he turned his head around, finding Kondou watching the scene with mild interest. Sougo searched his eyes for something, anything. He found nothing, though.

"Eh, I guess I could play a game today..." He murmured to himself, the bland look on his face turning into a sinister grin.

_How fun!_

* * *

_A lone figure stood, long blond hair whipping around softly in the wind. Another figure approached the first, linking their hands together._

_"Sensei...what you said...it was harsh..." The second figure murmured quietly, head bowed solemnly, as if trying not to get struck by said 'sensei'._

_"I know, but he needs to learn that he is not permitted to touch my _**THINGS**_," replied the first figure, his other hand brushing dark hair away from the second's face. "You are mine, and nobody else's. I don't care _**WHAT**_ — says. I will not permit anymore fooling around with that little whore."_

_The second figure nodded, finally lifting his head up to stare into the first's eyes. "I understand, Sensei."_

_"—, when we are alone, you must call me by my real name. Sensei is for when we're in public."_

_Once again, the dark haired figure nodded. "Okay, Shouyou..."_

_"Good boy." Shouyou leaned in and pressed a light kiss to the second figure's temple. "My Umenosuke...mine...only _**mine**_..."_

**/o\\\**

_A white-haired boy watched from the shadows, his lower lip trembling. He wiped his wet eyes, silently vowing not to cry once again that night. _

_He clutched his chest painfully at the sight of the two lone figures. They seemed so happy. He knew he shouldn't try to break their love for each other, but...he wanted to feel something akin to love also, even if it was just lust._

_He was just a youngling. He dint understand the aspects of love at the time, and, as he grew, he linked love with something impossible to reach; something undeniably out of his reach._

_The supposed physical aspects of an average relationship was what drew him into the life of fulfilling his own carnal needs, along with pleasuring his partners, be them male or female._

_As he grew, he watched the heartbroken scenes he'd created with eyes unseeing; his emotions barely bubbling up. No person had ever caused him to feel anything besides desire and avidity to create pleasure._

_He never wanted to fall. And he never planned to, either._

_If he did, he planned to break his own heart to separate himself from whatever the feeling of love was..._

* * *

**A/N: Aw yussss, replying to these lovely reviews! Mwah! XD**

_Life Starts Forever_: Haha! Finally an update! :3 And sorry, but no real lovey-dovey moments in this. I'll try to make sure they get close soon enough! ^^ Thanks for reading and reviwing! :) it means so much!

_karunebulous_: Haha, I love Tsukuyo to a certain point, and yes, she will be trying to separate them. D: But, there will be another antagonist coming soon, this one'll be an OC, cause I can't find any good characters to be a main antagonist along with Tsukuyo. Haha. (Not much of a GinTsuku fan here, so no moments for them...well, maybe a little...XD)

More Gin-chan past shiz biz goin on, ehe. I hate writing a sad Gin-chan, but it's gotta be done!

Until next time!


	12. Chapter 11

**_A/N_****: Oh, well, I don't even know WHERE to start with this. This chapter contains many things that I'm almost positive will start confusing the shit out of you. I apologize deeply for that.**

_Shorter than I'd like._

**Grammar and Spelling errors ahead.**

_ONWARDS!_

* * *

-**Chapter Eleven**-

* * *

The sun was rising above the horizon, there was soft breathing coming from the bed. Sougo stepped into his pants, slid them up, zipped the fly, and buttoned the top button. He figured he could find the belt later on.

He smiled elegantly to himself. He felt refreshed, renewed. He turned around, a grin sliding across his lips. He raised his eyebrows at the sleeping figure on his futon, a sadistic thought crossing his mind.

He strode over to the deeply asleep figure, picking up his vest and slipping it on, not bothering with either the outer coat nor the white scarf. He could just leave them for _after_ he kicked the sleeping person out of his room.

He raised his leg up and was just about to kick the guy out of his bed, when the bastard jolted awake, only to stare blearily up at Sougo.

"Mm...Sou-chan? What are you doing?" The guy's eyes flickered to Okita's raised leg, and back to his face. He slowly started to raise himself from the futon, but was quickly tugged upwards as Okita took ahold of the longish hair atop his head.

"_Itai_! _Itai_! _Itai_!"

Sougo released his hold on the man's hair, although he started to glare daggers into the male's soul. "Leave. You were my bitch for one night. Nothing more, nothing less. Leave me now, before I decide you need to die right here."

Nodding swiftly and with trepidation, the male looked around, grabbed his clothes, and ran out, slamming the shoji behind himself.

Sougo all but cackled to himself at the fear-stricken look on the guy's face. "Haaaaah, too funny. I just _love_ scaring the shit out of boys like him. Well, _bitches_ like him." Grinning sardonically, he decided to dress for the day. Maybe Kondou would pay attention to him, for once, not like a brother, but more like a lover.

"Ha! As-fucking-if."

* * *

—**THE DAY PRIOR**—

-_Sougo and His Group_-

Okita had his arm slung around Kagura the Yato's shoulder with relative ease, an easy-going smile on his lips. He kept pressing his body closer and closer to hers, which, in turn, caused his buddy Shimura Shinpachi to start trying to shove his in-between them. To no avail, though.

Sougo wouldn't give up his fun without a fight, and, at the moment, messing with the Yorozuya brats was the fun he'd been looking for to distract him, momentarily, from Kondou.

And, speaking of Kondou, he was just laughing his fucking ass off, a fucking cheesy grin on that fucking older (but still quite sexy) face. God, Okita just wanted to fuck that body into a mattress, all-the-while Kondou still retaining that perfect ass sexy grin. (Ah...was he drooling? Probably.)

He shook his head a bit, trying to get the image of a sex-induced Kondou out of his brain. He distracted himself by pressing his body even closer to the fourteen year old Yato. (Was this against the law, since, in the government's eyes, he was an adult? Eh, who gave a shit? He sure as hell didn't.)

"A-ah, Okita-san...w-what are you doing?" The Shimura boy stuttered out, his brown eyes blown wide from jealousy and a hint of anger.

Kagura, well, basically imploded at the sound of Shimpachi's voice. It was as if they were in an alternate universe and the younger girl _didn't_ supposedly hate Sougo's guts. (But hey, he was quite alright with having a non-pissed off Yato crushing on him.)

"Shut the hell up, Shinpachi! Nobody cares about blue balls you've suddenly gained," she hissed, her smaller body pressing even more close to Sougo. Without. His. Permission.

He jerked away a bit, disentangling himself from the almost vice-like grip she had suddenly obtained on his forearm. He nearly flinched at the shriek that came from the Shimura brat's mouth.

"KAGURA-CHAN! THOSE ARE UNLADYLIKE TERMS THAT A YOUNG GIRL SUCH AS YOURSELF SHOULD NOT SPEAK!"

Sougo growled, "Can it, Megane-Shimura. Danna isn't around, and it seems that neither Kondou nor I give a shit about her language. So shut your trap and let her speak at her own freewill." He ran a hand through his short, brown hair, his eyes glaring icily at Shinpachi, daring him to talk back.

The latter gulped, took a couple steps back, and lagged behind, his head drooping in dejection. Okita smirked, and turned his attention back to the orange/red haired girl walking beside him.

"Oi, Yato girl, doncha wanna go comfort your Megane-chan?" He questioned snidely, watching closely as multitudes of emotions flashed across her face. The emotions included: anger, confusion, regret, despair, and a bit of happiness; they were all gone in a second, her face composing itself within a couple of seconds.

"Of course not," she replied. "We may work together. We may both like Gin-chan, but he is _NOT_ my **Megane-chan**, as you so eloquently put it. Now, leave the topic alone." She nodded to herself at the words, then she quickly tacked on 'ya bastard' at the end.

Okita's eyes widen, just a teeny tiny bit (of course), and he stared at her in shock. She was fucking fourteen (and she didn't seem to be the sharpest tool in the shed), and she actually based her answer so coherently around Sougo's question it was, in fact, too shocking. He blinked rapidly a couple of times, and ever-so-slowly tried to remove himself from her personal space.

Which, somehow, actually worked. He ended up backtracking, forward tracking, all the way up to Kondou. He figured his eyes were still blown wide, because all Kondou did was pat his back soothingly, rubbing small circles there. The feeling almost made him groan in pleasure. Almost.

He inwardly sighed in happiness, a small smile ghosting across his lips. It felt so good; so _right_. He didn't want it to end, but, sadly, it did.

Okita and his group had ended up searching throughout the whole abandoned hospital, and were now leaving without so much as an answer to where exactly Katsura Kotarou was.

/**Time Skip**/

Sougo stood outside a gay bar, gulping down air like it was alcohol. He was nearly shaking with nerves and adrenaline. If any of his lady friends saw him here, he'd never hear the end of it during sex. And if any of his guy friends saw him here, he'd never hear the end of their taints and laughing. He shifted from foot to foot, continuously drawing in oxygen as he anxiously mulled over the pros and cons of entering a gay bar.

**Pros**:

_-He'd get laid._

_-He'd figure out if he was bi or not._

_-He'd get experience in anal._

_-He might get a new fuck buddy._

**Cons**:

_-He could be seen._

_-He'd get laid._

_-He'd fuck a guy._

_-It might get back to either Kondou or Hijikata_.

Wearily, he took the first few steps, opened the door, and sauntered in as if he owned the place, his nerves and fears going into the deep, dark depths of the back of his mind. Vaguely he took in the area of the bar, his eyes scanning across the patrons, waiters, and the one bartender.

He grins once his eyes make contact with deep, green hued emeralds that seem to glow in the dreary darkness. He strode over to the green-eyed man, his movements graceful and predator-like, as if he's a hunter in the prowl for a doe-eyed piece of ass. (Ah, that analogy suuuucked. He needed new comparisons if he wanted to make it in the gay world. Wait, did the gays have their own terminology? He'd have to look that up when he got the chance.)

"Hello there, handsome. If I might say, you have a _fine_ ass on you," he purred, his brown hair falling into his face.

The stranger grinned and moved closer to Sougo, his breath ghosting over his cheeks. "Hm, shouldn't we learn each other's names if we're gonna fuck?"

"Call me _SOU-CHAN_. There. Happy? What's your name, babe?"

"Mm, I'm Umenosuke. And yes, I'm quite happy, in fact. Do you top? Or maybe bottom?"

"Top is definitely my thing."

"Good. We'll get along _just fine_." Umenosuke's fingers trailed lightly down Sougo's vest-covered chest. "So, Sou-chan. Your place or mine?"

"Mine."

Both of the males grinned. Sougo just about _dragged_ Umenosuke out of the bar, all the while the green-eyed man just laughed and went along.

They were both ready for the ride of their lives.

* * *

-_Gin-chan and His Group_-

Gintoki shuffled painfully along behind Hijikata, Otae, and Yamazaki. He griped and groaned every time his upper thighs brushed against his bruised balls and dick, which was every fucking second, it seemed.

He grit his teeth as he glared daggers at Hijikata's retreating back. He planned on getting revenge soon enough. (Maybe when they were fucking he'd force Hijikata to go through orgasm denial. Hah.)

He didn't expect them to be fucking any time soon, considering Gintoki probably wouldn't be able to come int he next couple of weeks. Surely, though, they could dry hump and make out. He grinned hopefully at the thought.

He didn't notice, but as he was drooling and grimacing, Otae continuously looked back at him, then at Hijikata, her conversation with Yamazaki never wavering. And since he didn't notice, he never caught the eery glares she sent the mayora's way, or the nearly infatuated glances she sent him.

All in all, he missed just about everything that was going on, and once they reached the entrance of the abandoned building once again, he shook himself out of his fantasies of binding Hijikata up and making him wear frilly lace panties. Their group broke up, each of them going their own way.

/**Time Skip**/

Gintoki strolled lazily through the streets of Kabukicho, a small carton of strawberry milk gripped tightly in his hand. He needed to hurry home, or else Shinpachi might get some ideas on what to do with a lonely Kagura. He inwardly shuddered at the thought.

"Mm, better not go there," he wryly said to himself. With graceless ease, he drank his milk and walked, paying not mind to any other citizens.

As he kept on walking, his feet suddenly stopped working, his eyes widening. His breath became shaky at the sight of Okita and another man leaving a bar he usually frequented. But, it wasn't the sight of the sadistic 'womanizer' Sougo with a man. It was the man in question.

It was **_that_** man. Umenosuke. _Shit_.

"I'll be damned." And he probably was, if the smirk that was sent his way was any thing to go by. He shuddered and clutched his head, his eyes shutting as memories of pain and hurt flitted through his mind.

He just about collapsed on the crowded street, but hurriedly moved to an alley. He leant against the brick wall, his back slowly sliding down as his legs gave out on him. He shuddered, his body shaking.

"God, this fucking sucks...why'd he have to come back...?"

* * *

—**THE DAY AFTER**—

-_Gin-chan's Harem_-

"Ne, so, Otae-chan, what happened yesterday with Gintoki and that demon-man?"

Shimura Tae scratched the back of her neck, not willing to admit that she'd barely paid them any attention, since she was fairly distracted by that Yamazaki man. But, of course, she'd seen Gin get kicked in the nuts by Hijikata, so she told them that.

The women's reactions to it was fucking hilarious. (Like, haaaaaalarious.)

Otose scoffed, Tsukuyo gaped, Ayame got teary eyed, and Kyuubei grimaced. Otae smirked at them all. "It's true, ya know," she stated dryly.

Varying types of raised eyebrows were sent her way, Otose speaking first. "Anything else that you might have forgotten?"

She shook her head. "Yup, that was basically it. Gin-san hit on Hijikata-san, but it wasn't much until he got a foot in the balls."

The younger women of the harem sighed. Then they said in unison, "That wasn't very much information..."

Otose smirked, her gaze boring holes into Tsukuyo. "Ah, yes, Tsukuyo, you're next to spy on our Gintoki."

Obediently Tsukuyo nodded, blond hair falling into her face. "Hai, Otose-san."

* * *

Tsukuyo glared angrily at her feet, her back against an alley wall. She was bored; so bored, in fact, that she would willingly suck that Shimura Shinpachi's dick if she had to. Though, she would _never_ do that if the had the choice. Gintoki was the only one for her. (Hah. Funny.)

She was keen to just get her spying shit done and over with, so that she could head home and start on her master plan. It wasn't much of a plan, yet. Soon enough, she'd start getting to the real badassery of her sinister and diabolical plan. (Pft, she sounded like one of those weird-ass villains from those American cartoons.)

She crossed her arms in front of her, willing away the urge to crack her knuckles and do something physical for a change. But she couldn't just abandon her post. It WAS her day to spy on both Gintoki and Hijikata. (She didn't really want to, well, maybe spying on Gintoki wasn't _so_ bad, but Hijikata just pissed her off.)

With a huff, she stopped leaning against the wall, and stood tall and firm, smirking. She raised her brows at the sight in front of her.

There was Gintoki, who was, as per usual, flirting away with random women, although Tsukuyo knew he flirted with men at night. It wasn't as if the women would _actually_ take him up on any offer for casual sex. Besides, Gin probably wouldn't be able to get it up, anyway. Even if he flirted, they always seemed to have that effect on him. (She knew from _personal_ experience.) it was pretty funny to watch him fail so epically. Usually she wouldn't even crack a smile at him flirting with another, but, for the time being, her mind was currently occupied by her plan.

Vaguely, she wondered if her odd interest in the Yorozuya perm-head was _finally_ ending, but she quickly shook her head of the thought. Of course it wasn't going away anytime soon. First off, she needed to date him, then get bored, and _**then**_ she'd be able to dump his ass and walk off.

It was just how she worked. It was pretty depressing, she must admit. Eh, who cared?

She grimaced inwardly when he seemed to have taken notice of her, his red eyes gazing right at her. She cocked her head to the side, a seductive smile gracing her lips. With a cheeky grin and a small wave, Gintoki striding, less than gracefully, over to her.

"Ne, Tsukuyo-chan, it's quite the _pleasure_ to see you here." He grinned cockily at her, his wine red eyes lazy and apathetic. As-fucking-usual.

"Mm, Gin-san, how are you?" She questioned lightly, pulling her _kiseru_ from her kimono. She stuck it in her mouth.

"I'm very fine, actually." His grinning continued, while his gaze moved over her body lecherously. She shivered, just a bit, her face turning a decent shade of pink. "And you, pretty lady?"

"T'ch, you know how I am. But, anyways, I'm acceptable, really." She sucked on the tip of her _kiseru_ in a manner not unlike a child sucking on the slightly sweet lollipop stick.

She noticed his mannerisms seemed...off. Huh. She wondered what happened to actually _make_ Sakata Gintoki seem off.

"And, you don't _**seem**_ 'fine', Gin-san. What's the matter?" She asked him carefully, not wanting to prod _too_ much, in case he caught on that she'd been stalking(spying on) him.

"Ah, you chucklehead, I'm truly fine. No worries."

"Chucklehead? Uh..."

She noted that his attention quickly sidetracked to someone else, his eyes trained on them like a dog. She glanced over and shuddered. It was Hijikata.

Well, at least she could spy some more and get more details on their 'relationship', if they even had one. She gently nudged him with her hand. "Go on. Go talk to your man."

Gintoki laughed and sauntered off. Tsukuyo pervertedly started to watch that perfect ass go. Ah, she was going to Hell.

* * *

**A/N: Ah, yes. The chapter is finally over, you people have lived through a horror fest of random shit and road blocks. Dafuq am I saying? I don't know. Reviews and their replies! **

_Life Starts Now_: Ah, once again, not very much GinHiji action, but I SWEAR the next chapter will have something, be it fluff, smut, or even angst for them. ^^

_karunebulous_: I'm not sure when I'll actually shove in a woman just to make Gin-chan rage, but I'll try. I'll try so fucking hard. XD Also, I think Hijikata will be a 'gay only for Gintoki' kinda guy, sort of like Kondou, but without Sougo trying to get a piece of that ass. (ShitwhatamIsaying,Idontevenknowanymore.)

There wasn't much on Otae spying, but she told the harem basically what happened. Does that count? Pft, probably not.

There was teeny tiny bit of Sougo being a 'playa', but mainly he was a little shit to Shinpachi. XD

I freaking love Shouyou-sensei, but he seemed too...nice and good, for my liking. So, I popped in Umenosuke-chwan, and WHALAH, bitchy ass Shouyou.

Umenosuke-chwan will be my favorite OC for, like, ever, so I gotta make him count, especially in the story. He'll be appearing more and more often soon. Very soon.

Until next time!


	13. Chapter 12

**A/N: Holy fuck, this is super duper late. I am so so freaking sorry about that! I got caught up with school work and another story I've gotten caught up in. Really sorry!**

_Major apologies for any and all mistakes that I've made._

**Enjoy~**

* * *

-**Chapter Twelve**-

* * *

Hijikata raised his eyebrows at the shit-eating grin on Gintoki's masculine face. "What do you want, damn Yorozuya?"

"Give me some goddamned comfort, Oogushi-kun!" The younger man bellowed out as he tried to climb all over Hijikata, which was considerably less freaky than what Hijikata had seen the man actually do. But, he still prized wandering hands from his body, shoving Gintoki away.

While Gintoki glared, Hijikata carefully smoothened out his uniform. He then looked up and questioned angrily, "Do you even know what personal space is?!"

A shake of the head and a quietly murmured 'no, not really' was the only reply he received.

With a sigh, Hijikata ran a hand through his dark hair, muttering curses under his breath before, finally, he got up the nerve to ask why Gintoki needed 'comfort', and what the Yorozuya meant by 'comfort'.

"Any way you'd like, actually. It doesn't matter to me. Just keep me company or something. Drink with me, watch porn with me, sit in the park with me." He took in a long, deep breath. "_Anything_."

Gin's eyes seemed...darker. Like a deeper, richer red wine, or freshly spilt blood. He saw no emotion. Gintoki's eyes were basically dead.

It irked Hijikata to no end that any single person's eyes could hide so much. Usually, he could read somebody's emotions with absolute ease. Along with being annoyed, he felt a deep sadness for Gintoki; he was hiding something that must have caused too much pain, and the only way to escape it was to just lock it away from prying eyes.

Deciding to at least give something, no matter how small, to make Gintoki smile, Hijikata placed his hand on the other's shoulder, beaming relatively easily at him. "Sure, anything you want." He paused. "Anything _except_ sex, okay?"

Grinning, Gintoki nodded enthusiastically. "Okay!"

* * *

Gintoki wasn't exactly sure _why_ he wanted to spend time with Hijikata. He never wanted to do that with any of his other fuck buddies, or even the ones he wanted to fuck but hadn't gotten the chance to yet. So why was he suddenly wanting to be close to the raven-haired vice-commander? It didn't make sense.

He could easily just brush it off as wanting to keep him distracted, but just the thought of that made his heart lurch painfully in his chest.

His hand gripped Hijikata's wrist, dragging him through the streets of Kabukicho, heading toward his home above Otose's place.

Once they reached his home, he slid open the shoji and drug the darker-haired male inside, slamming the shoji shut behind them. He released Hijikata's wrist, who in turn rubbed the darkening marks of fingerprints there.

"T'ch, now what? You brought me to your place, so what are we going to do, anyway?" Questioned Hijikata angrily, his teeth making an almost-silent grinding noise.

"As I said earlier, Oogushi-kun, anything you want. As long as it distracts me." He produced a list from his yukata, handing it over to the Shinsengumi vice-commander gracefully. "If you take a look at this, maybe you could choose."

Hijikata scanned over the list quickly, his eyes flitting from the paper to Gintoki's face multiple times, which made the Yorozuya grin sheepishly at him. He raised his hands in mock submission. "Hey, don't judge me on the way I distract myself."

"I'm not...it's just– most of your 'distractions' include either penetrative sex, or oral sex. What gives? Can't you find some other toy that'll actually do this shit with you rather than a straight guy who can barely stand to be in a room with ya?"

"No, only you will do, Oogushi-kun. You can ignore your wanton needs all you like, but I _know_ that you enjoy our little make-out sessions whenever you're drunk off your ass. Now, choose something, damnit!" He replied offhandedly, his eyes narrowing at the slight blush on Hijikata's face. Telling himself to remember that look for the rest of his days, Gintoki grabbed the list from Hijikata's hands.

"You take _way_ too long, Oogushi-kun. I've started to go gray thank to you!"

Hijikata guffawed at that.

"What? You don't believe me when I say I'm going gray? Fucking shit, is it _really_ that hard to tell?!" He smirked slyly and reviewed the list, searching for the safest route to take for 'distracting' himself and flirting with his Oogushi-kun. "Hm, how about this, Oogushi-kun?"

He held out the list to Hijikata, pointing at the seventh one down.

**HORROR MOVIE MARATHON**

"E-eh?! Why..why horror mo-movies?!" Hijikata shivered noticeably, making Gintoki internally laugh.

He didn't exactly enjoy horror movies either, but it'd give him the chance to get to know the darker haired male better than before. Well, actually, he deeply _despised_ horror movies, and would do just about anything to get out of a horror movie marathon, although this would give him the chance for bonding by screaming their lungs out.

He nodded. "Yup. Fun, amiright? Or are you too chicken to stay and watch them with me? Ya know, I can ways watch them alone, or with someone else . . . ."

"I am most definitely _not_ too chicken, ya fuckin perm-head!" Squawked Hijikata in indignation, his eyebrows knit together in a peeved scowl.

With a grin, Gintoki moved to his couch, plopped down, and patted the space next to him. "Come and sit next to me, Oogushi-kun~, and then I'll put the first movie in."

Sighing, Hijikata took the seat next to Gin, pulling his legs onto the couch and into himself, wrapping his arms around his knees. "Nuh-uh, Oogushi-kun. No feet on the couch unless you're shoes are _off,_ which they apparently are not. Now, remove your them, and then we'll talk about allowing your feet on my nice couch." With that, he stood and moved to the small television, poking and prodding it until he found the DVD player. He pulled the DVD box from his yukata, opened it, removed the disk from it, and pushed the disk into the slot.

While he'd done all that, and once he was back in his very comfortable butt-owned seat, he noticed that Hijikata had removed his shoes and now was sitting cross-legged on the couch, a scowl firmly planted upon his face. The fact that Hijikata was actually willing to watch movies, even horror, with Gintoki made him want to wiggle about from happiness, but he held himself back. He needed to be calm and collected, or else Hijikata would get the wrong idea and leave early. And that was _not_ happening.

**/**

The next few hours during the first movie were absolutely horrid. Way too many jump-scares and creepy ass ghosts popping up, causing both Hijikata to scream and clutch each other in fear. Once the ghost was gone, though, they'd immediately released each other from their death grips, Hijikata glaring and Gintoki looking sheepish.

It was not something they wanted to talk about.

The next movie wasn't as bad as the first, but it still almost made them lose their shit throughout it, continuously getting closer and closer to each other during the scary parts. A couple of times they'd grabbed ahold of each other's hands, and then immediately released them when themed realized what they had done.

The third movie was probably the worst for them. Each and every time a ghost or monster popped up, they each screeched like banshees, their eyes blown wide from fear and horror. During the bloody parts, they both were gagging like mother fuckers, covering their mouths as they did so, in case they actually did vomit.

They both knew they were going to be having horrific nightmares that night. If they even fell asleep, that is.

**/**

After six long, and scary, movies, both Hijikata and. Gintoki were huddles so close together, they could almost feel each other's heart beats. When the sixth movie finally ended, they separated slowly, not exactly wanting to lose the camaraderie that they'd gotten out of each other during the long hours of horror movies.

Gintoki scratched the back of his head awkwardly, turning off the TV as he did so. He turned to look at his. Oogushi-kun, who was shivering in fear. "Ne, Oogushi-kun, would you prefer to spend the night, or would you like to head to your barracks? Kagura won't be home tonight; she's staying with Shinpachi and the gorilla woman. So, it's your choice."

He would hug Hijikata to death if he decided to stay, considering Gintoki definitely didn't want to spend any time alone that night. After watching horror movies, he'd have to wait a few days either with people or not sleeping at all, since they scared him that much.

As Hijikata seemed to think over his two choices, Gintoki went off to his room to set up his futon for the night, and, just in case, Hijikata's own futon. Although he would prefer Hijikata to sleep with him in his futon, he wouldn't push it, since he was lucky enough to spend quite a bit of time with him.

Maybe, if he was lucky, Hijikata would crawl into Gintoki's futon and they'd make-out and, hopefully, have sex. (Ahhhh, that would be great.)

He slipped back out into the office/living room of his home, only to find Hijikata stripping down until he was left in tight boxer briefs with mini mayonnaise bottles scattered about on them. Gintoki covered his mouth to stifle a laugh, since it was so like his Oogushi-kun to have that type of underwear on. Well, he couldn't talk. Gintoki always tried to wear a pair of underwear with either parfaits, strawberries, or any type of candy on them.

With a sly smirk, he snuck up behind Hijikata, wrapping his arms around his lean, but well-muscled, waist. "Na, Oogushi-kun, are you coming to bed yet?" He murmured against the skin of the darker haired male's neck, kissing the racing pulse there.

Hijikata shivered in Gintoki's arms, and that brought about a wry smile on his face. His hands trailed up along the vice-commander's abdomen, feeling up the hard and lean muscle there. He then brought. His hands lower, brushing over his Oogushi-kun's groin, where Gin could tell he was getting, even just a tiny bit, turned on.

"Mm, Oogushi-kun, do you like my touch...?" His hands moved from Hijikata's crotch all the way up to his well-built chest. Gintoki's hands splayed out over Hijikata's nipples, rubbing soothingly over the pink nubs. He figured he WAS being creepy, but he really, really loved touching his Oogushi-kun, even if said man didn't always enjoy his touches and advances.

"Y-Yorozuya! D-don't...p-plea–" Gintoki cut Hijikata off as he squeezed both of the nubs between his fingers, rolling them around and pulling lightly, causing the latter to gasp and groan. The darker haired male writhed in Gin's clutches, trying to move away but not getting very far when his body was wracked with another groan of pleasure.

"Hah, Oogushi-kun, I'll have to make a note of the fact that you just LOVE your nipples being played with," he jeered at the man in his arms. Gintoki continued to prod and pull at the nubs, which were now hard and pinker than before. "This is so, so much fun. Way better than just watching horror flicks...how about we head to bed? I'll love on you all night long..."

Hijikata tensed up and quickly struggled out of Gintoki's arms, backing away until he hit the far wall. "No. I may spend the night here, but we will _not_ sleep together. I won't allow it." He covered his chest and made his way to Gintoki's room. "Which futon's mine?" He looked back at the perm headed male.

"I– that one," Gin replied, and pointed dutifully at one of the futons. Hijikata nodded and walked over, climbing in, leaving Gintoki to his own thoughts ache made his way into dream land.

_Ah, shit. I really messed up, didn't I?_

He then also climbed into his own futon, shutting his eyes as he slid off into a deep, dark slumber.

* * *

Katsura yawned and stretched out on the hard, wooden bench. He knew that when he woke up in the morning he'd have tons of kinks to work out of his back, but it was definitely better than sharing a nice, warm bed with Takasugi. Well, it sounded worse, but truly, Zura couldn't trust the sly bastard.

Even if they did grow up together, and Takasugi did save him from the clutches of the Shinsengumi, he didn't want to fully allow himself into the warm embrace of someone that could so easily stab him in the back once he lost his usefulness.

Zura would never admit it out loud, but he had once had a teeny-tiny crush on Takasugi, although that so-called crush ended quickly once he saw how much of a bastard the shorter man was. He would never tell anyone how attractive the man was – he was most likely a kinky fucker in bed, so sleeping with him was out of the question.

The stars were twinkling high above him, and just the sight of them made him smile. He'd been on a few dates in his lifetimes, and the best had been with Gintoki out under the stars; making love and eating fresh food from a café that served food late at night. He knew Gintoki would never admit it outright, but the man was such a romantic at heart. He seemed to love to woo people into his bed, even if it was only for one night. Though, luckily, Katsura had had the chance to be with him more than just once. Now Gintoki was after a Shogunate dog; not his best choice, Zura had to say.

"You idiot...did you not realize how much I love you...?" He whispered to himself.

"I'm flattered, Zura. I had no idea. But, sadly, you're not my type," Takasugi stated dryly from his sudden appearance next to Katsura's bench.

Katsura leaned up, threw his legs over the edge of the bench, and sat up. He crossed his arms in front of him and glared up at a smirking Takasugi. "Che, I wasn't talking to or about you, Shinsuke."

With a creepy smile, the shorter male took a seat next to Zura. "I know, I know. But why're you out here, anyways? It's not safe for you to be out here, ya know..."

"I know, but it's more comfortable out here..."

"What if one of the Shogunate dogs see you out here, and recognize you? You need to come inside, Zura, and stay with me. Alright?" Replied Takasugi, his voice serious and cool.

Katsura sighed and stood. "Fuck it, let's just go inside. I'll sleep on the floor."

Takasugi stood also and led the way into the abandoned building, Zura following close behind. He turned his head back to look at Katsura, his gaze warm and comforting. "You do know you can sleep in the futon with me, right?"

"Ha! That's not happening."

Takasugi shrugged. "Alright, your choice," he responded, mirth evident in his voice.

"T'ch, ass." Was all Katsura said.

* * *

**A/N: Did ya like? Did ya not like? Wanna tell me what ya wanna see? Have questions? Then review! Here are my review replies.**

_Life Starts Now_: Ahhhh *bows* I am so so so so so freaking sorry for the über late update. There was a teeny-weeny bit of smuttish(?) action in this chapter, no sex but still. There was some lovin going on :P

_Amzilla_: Thank you so much! That means a lot! :3 And, I must admit, I don't particularly like playing sprung with Kagura's feelings, but it must be done or else there will be zero ShinKagu action going on XD Yes, I agree, they do basically all have pretty great asses ^^

I'm glad you decided to read it, and that you think it's hot! :)

Thanks, once again, so so so much! I hope you stick around with me and this story. ^w^

_Usa-mones_: I searched online (wikia dot com) and it came up as Katsura Kotarou, so I figured Kotarou was his first name, since I'm almost positive Takasugi's first name is Shinsuke. I could be wrong though. Anyways, I hope that answered your question, though I'm not sure if you stayed around long enough for this chapter update, since you left a review at chapter 2 (chapter 1 to me, I think? Idk). O.o

_karunebulous_: Sougo is just a bloody whore, amiright? And Umenosuke is just an asssssss. (He fuckin loves sexxxxxy times with the males of the Gintama cast, except for the straight ones)

I feel like I sorta over did Gin-chan's reaction to Umenosuke, so if I did, sorry. Also, Umenosuke will most likely stick around just to be a jackass to Gin-chan. :P

Tsukuyo will be stalker material soon enough, and she'll be witnessing soooooo many things. XD Sadly, I don't see anything happening between her and Gin-chan, unless it was in the past.

I loved Shouyou-sensei, but I feel that he may have had a darker side than what Sorachi showed, although I don't think he was actually gay in the real anime/manga. XD


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